Do you need to take drastic measures to be taken seriously?

I suspect many eyebrows were raised at the cover of this week's Body and Soul supplement, with the headline 'Why having a baby boosts the creative mind'. This morning, Seema writes with an unusual take:

"One of the things I have struggled with since giving birth 2.5 years ago is me-time. I am a mother of one , sister to five, have two elderly parents, work four days a week... Last September I decided to enrol in a creative writing course; this is something I have always wanted to do. I enrolled in a university course so that everyone will take it seriously rather than thinking that this is a silly pursuit.

It worked, as it forced everyone (and that includes me) to not disturb me during the time I spent on the course.  Add to that I could legitimately tell people that I am not avaiable as I need to get my coursework done.

I wonder if other working mums make time for themselves and whether anyone has taken drastic measures like me?"

Comments

[Bonnie]

Having something outside the home to focus on worked for me. When I had my son I was training to be a yoga teacher and it was my "saving grace". Once a month I went off for a whole day to be "a student teacher" and had a break from being a mother, wife etc. I only missed one session (when I was in labour!), and was back 4 weeks after giving birth (by emergency c-section as fate would have it), and people thought I was mad. Even though it was a challenge to keep up with essay deadlines etc., having something other than a new baby to focus on was a relief. My husband had our son while I studied and I think he really enjoyed it.

[supermother]

I suppose alpha mothers don't need that as their successful work already provides that buzz, public praise etc but in terms of relaxation time that's hard for everyone, parents or not. The secret is to adore our work given how long you spend on it but don't worry about it when you're not doing it.

One important secret is to ensure ify ou do have a partner/spouse that you and they have the same amount of me time. So many women shoot themselves in the foot and then whinge about it (silly them) by allowing or enabling their other half to have me time they don't.

[Rachel]

i think the happy balance come's when the youngest hits 14 and has no desire to spend time with their parents yay, 10 years 4 weeks, 3 days and counting in my case lol.

[Emma Robinson]

I agree, I have one son aged 2, my husband and I run our own business and my son is in child care four days a week. Friday I spend with him. I feel like I never have any time to myself, if I want to go running, which is one thing I am not prepared to give up, I feel I have to negotiate that 1 hour by trading that time and getting up at the crack of dawn all week with my son for that 1 hour on a Friday. Guilt is another big factor to lack of 'me' time as my son is in childcare four days, I feel when he is at home, I should be with him, is there ever a happy balance?

[Rachel]

I agree, you do need a legitamate excuse to have 'me' time when your a parent, and you have to change that excuse every 6 months or so as it looses credibility, you can also only use said excuse for a limited period of time per day/week (depending on excuse), and you have to choose that time carefuly, i have also found that if your visable your accessable, what is that about, dont 4 and 5 year olds understand 'me time' LMAO.