Where am I?

HOME
  • COMMENT Blogs Alphamummy

Alpha Mummy - Times Online - WBLG

Alpha Mummy is the blog for mums who work, used to work, or want to go back to work one day.

« What should we be teaching our children, and when? | All Posts | A strange name in today's news »

July 24, 2008

The 20 strangest baby names

Retrobaby

Michael Moran, the books editor for Times Online, has discovered a book that makes every Jane Doe or Tom, Dick and Harry thank their lucky stars.

We're familiar with the celebrity trend of giving children playful, silly, impractical names on the basis that they'll never have to endure the vicissitudes of a real school or workplace. The first one most of us noticed was probably Zowie Bowie, or perhaps Marc Bolan's little boy Rolan, and probably reached its apotheosis in the wilful christening flightiness evinced by Bob Geldof or Gywneth Paltrow. 

Michael Sherrod and Matthew Rayback, the authors of a new book, Bad Baby Names, have looked into a century of US census reports and discovered that the history of weird names is longer, and stranger, than most of us could have possibly imagined…

Here, in ascending order of weirdness, are the 20 strangest:

20: Wanna Funk

19: United States

18: Lotta Bacon

17: Hysteria Johnson

16: Waitress Seholley

15: Nail Rambo

14: Jump Jump

13: Tackle Feigenbutz

12: Mustard M.Mustard

11: Jelly Bean Cook

10: Fat Meat Fields

9: Geography Bryan

8: Zero Pie

7: Cylinder Klinefelter

6: Nice Veal

5: Cylclops Walthour

4: Envy Burger

3: Cancer Grindstaff

2: Young Boozer

1: Dracula Taylor

And, just to demonstrate that not all parents are capricious and michevous come christening time, here are an even dozen names that I’d prefer to plain old Michael Moran:

Peach Skeeters

Watermelon Pete McNeil

Experience Fairweathers

Limbo Holloway

Bluebell Plopper

Beauty Outlaw

Darth Wilson

Christian Devil

Welcome Darling

Sexy Chambers

Love Catts

Permelia Buckaroo

Bad Baby Names by Michael Sherrod and Matthew Rayback is published by Ancestry.co.uk, priced £4.99

Other great Alpha Mummy lists

* 12 most expensive celebrity baby pictures

* 5 tips for a streamlined life

* 5 reasons why maternity leave is bad for women

* 90 best classic children's books

* 7 worst sexy toys for kids

Posted by Times Online | Permalink Bookmark and Share

Comments

The 20 strangest baby names

Retrobaby

Michael Moran, the books editor for Times Online, has discovered a book that makes every Jane Doe or Tom, Dick and Harry thank their lucky stars.

We're familiar with the celebrity trend of giving children playful, silly, impractical names on the basis that they'll never have to endure the vicissitudes of a real school or workplace. The first one most of us noticed was probably Zowie Bowie, or perhaps Marc Bolan's little boy Rolan, and probably reached its apotheosis in the wilful christening flightiness evinced by Bob Geldof or Gywneth Paltrow. 

Michael Sherrod and Matthew Rayback, the authors of a new book, Bad Baby Names, have looked into a century of US census reports and discovered that the history of weird names is longer, and stranger, than most of us could have possibly imagined…

  • Alpha
    Mummy's
    team

    Jennifer Howze, mother of one and stepmother of one, is Lifestyle editor of Times Online
    Eleanor Mills is Associate Editor, The Sunday Times and a columnist on News Review
    Caitlin Moran, mother of two, is a columnist for The Times
    Sarah Vine, mother of two, is a columnist for The Times

    Photobucket

    About this Blog

    all you need to know about
    Alpha Mummy Read our Terms & Conditions

    Nice to Tweet you

      Twitter Updates

        follow me on Twitter

      Latest posts

      Latest comments

      School Gate

      The Library

      • 10 things to know
        before choosing a school
      • 10 articles to read before going back to work
      • 10 blogs every working mum should read
      • 6 things you should know: legal advice forums
      • 5 children's TV characters I'd shag

      Our
      Favourite Sites

      • Brain, child
      • Dooce
      • Mumsnet
      • Wife in the North
      • Families Online
      • Slate
      • Huffington Post
      • Parent Hacks
      • The Wall Street Journal's The Juggle
      • Rachel from North London

      Free Books for Schools

      • Register now for our scheme

      Categories

      Select from the dropdown

      Archives

      • View previous blog posts