Elevator Encounter

All sorts of people live in my building in NY. Yesterday I was in the elevator at around 7 pm waiting for the doors to close when a man got on at the last moment and pressed 14. Normally I don't talk to people on the elevator. But he was wearing scrubs. “Are you a doctor?” I asked. He replied yes, he was. “Do you live in the building?”
He told me he did.
Suddenly, I was excited. “What kind of doctor are you?”
“I’m a gastroenterologist.”
“A gastroenterologist? I need a gastroenterologist! Can I get your card?”
He paused.
“I don’t really like to treat people who live in the building.”
“Why? Because they know where you live?”
He looked uncomfortable.
“What do you need a gastroenterologist for?”
“I think I have IBS”
“You don’t have IBS. It’s stress and diet.”
“How do you know?”

We had reached his floor and he was about to step off the elevator but not wanting to be rude, he held the door from shutting with is arm and continued the conversation.

“Why do you think it’s IBS?”
“Because I’m bloated all the time and…” Just then I realized rather than have him hold the elevator, why not get off at his floor? I stepped off the elevator.
He looked disappointed. Now we were standing in the hallway.

“I’m telling you,” he said, “It’s stress and diet.”
“What if it’s not? What if it’s colon cancer?”
“Do you have a history of colon cancer in your family?”
“No.” I paused. “Not that I know of.”
“Ok,’ he said, reaching into his pocket, and backing up. “Here’s my card. I gotta go. Dinner’s on the table”

I thanked him and when I got upstairs to my apartment, I put his card on my desk. I'll keep it but I probably won't call him. He's right, it would be weird. I don't like people checking out what I'm bringing back from the supermarket - why would I want to run into someone who knows what going on in my intestines?

Comments

[Annie]

Imagine having to eat dinner with a gastroenterologist in this work clothes! His wife really has a good reason to ban her husband from bringing work home.
Good for you for getting a free elevator consultation!

[Brian]

Who on earth was that girl in the photo they wrongly put up here with the new format? She had a tan, and looked as if she was incapable of ever wearing black. The scale of the mistake initially stunned me but at least then released me from the purdah of silence engendered by jermaine's 'jermajesty' revelation.

[ariel j]

this is why it is good for rabbis to see doctors outside the congregation. one really doesn't want to have to shake the hand of one's gynaecologist or proctologist on rosh hashanah