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Arsenal: Gallas' Silence Speaks Volumes

You’d have thought that rather than simple knee ligament damage, William Gallas was recovering from tongue surgery; such has been the defeaning silence from the ex-Arsenal skipper.  Gallas was too easy a target for hostile Arsenal fans at the end of the 07/08 season and the start of the 08/09 season.  While the outburst that resulted in the loss of the captaincy was untimely and should have remained in house, the words that he spoke were not exactly far from the truth.  Gallas’ cry for the team to be “warriors” is a plea that I’m sure resonates with every Arsenal fan. 

Arsenal: I Believe In Bendtner

If you read a lot of blog posts and articles about Nicklas Bendtner everything will tell you that he is an awful striker.  If you happened to watch Arsenal's matches against Roma or Blackburn you may have seen with your very own eyes what Nicklas has to offer.  I myself have even been particularly scathing towards the young Dane.  After his petulant performance against Burnley in the Carling Cup, I wrote a fake letter from Nike to Bendtner that ordered him to stop wearing his pink Nike boots as he was tainting their reputation.  However, in the past few months the Dane's performances have began to reassure me that he really is the real deal. 

Arsenal: Phil's Cracking Up

Waking up and reading today's media maelstrom over Cesc Fabregas' supposed spitting at Hull City's assistant manager Brian Horton has actually left me laughing.  Watching Phil Brown's post-match interview on Setanta was frankly painful. He actually managed to convince himself that a) his team did not deserve to lose and that b) his team were not time wasting. 

Somewhat shockingly, Phil Brown has managed to take a heroic 2-1 win at the Emirates in September and turn into the spawning of some feud between Arsenal and Hull City.  Such feuds with teams outisde the Big Four and Sp*rs only seem to occur when a particular Sam Alardyce manages the club, in this case Allardyce's apprentice has taken it upon himself to trigger a new and pointless feud with Arsenal.

Arsenal: 20% Chance of Arshavin Joining Arsenal, says Agent

Andrei Arshavin's agent Dennis Lachter has denied rumours that his client is on a flight from Zenit St. Petersburg's training camp in Dubai to London.

Arsenal - The Kids Are Alright

When Zat Knight rifled in a ninety-second minute equaliser I was left screaming.  Standing up with TV remote in hand, I pondered throwing it against the wall, before choosing to wing in it into the safer option of the sofa.  There was an overwhelming and painful sense of Deja-Vu that every Arsenal fan around the world was feeling, as the pretenders to the fourth Champions League spot ran to the corner in euphoric celebration, but at least we were spared the nonchalant arrogance of a certain Agbonlahor.

The first half of the match was a circus.  Calamitous is a word that perfectly sums of the defending that was carried by the likes of William Gallas and Kolo Toure.  Once again Arsenal were left bemoaning an injury, this time to Johan Djourou in the warm up, one of the only players to hit some form.  Sidwell hit bar before it ricocheted of a statue-eque Denilson on the line.  Nasri gave Milner half the park to hit the post and Curtis Davies floated a suave shot onto the bar.  All this before Bicycle Bacary Sanga cleared off the line in the most acrobatic of styles.  Then suddenly, out of the blue, Arsenal's ever present Denilson popped up to calmly give Arsenal the lead and a samba dance to boot.

Arsenal: A letter from Nike to Nicklas Bendtner

[Disclaimer: our reporter imagines how the company might have reacted to the Dane's performance against Burnley]

Dear Nicklas,

                    We are writing to you today to inform you that we are terminating the contract that allows you to wear our new Nike Mercurial Vapor Rosa boots

At Nike we worked long and hard on the celebrated pink boots and each time we see a player sporting the Rosas all of us here at Nike feel a great sense of pride.

However, here at Nike we believe in sticking to our word above all else.  To us there is nothing worse than breaking a promise.  I must now point you in the direction of our press release for the Rosas.

Arsenal: Wenger should follow Gordon Brown's lead

 

Arsene Wenger is no fool and if there's one thing apart from football that he knows like the back of his hand, it's economics.  It's no coincidence that the Premier league's most shrewd transfer market manager has a masters in economics and now he must turn to his economic know how to get Arsenal out of this current crisis

Arsenal: A Response

Moron, stupid, tunnel-visioned, narrow minded, elitist, whinger, pathetic, partisan, biased, delusional.  These were just a few of the things I was called in response to my article bemoaning some of Stoke City's tackling on Arsenal players last Saturday.

First of all I'd like to thank all of you who took the time to read the article and who subsequently offered their opinion.  I mention the insults, but there was also a large proportion of positive comments for which I am grateful.

But I feel that I have to respond to some of the comments, mainly due to the fact that much of my article was misinterpreted by many (not all).

Arsenal: Wenger cannot be more right about Stoke

The post-Stoke fallout was to be expected, a blind person in a pitch black room could have seen that coming, but the extent in which Arsenal's critics have piled it on has perplexed me.

After Arsenal play a match I somewhat obsessively read nearly every broadsheet's match report and weigh up an general opinion amongst the media.  It soon became clear that Arsenal were being portrayed as a team of wet blankets, a team that practice "pure" football and shun the ugly side of the game.  There is legitimacy to some of these claims and the absence of any sort of defensive midfielder is starting to become painfully obviously (no, Alex Song does not count).  The strength of the attacks on Arsenal were alarmingly hostile, some also resonating from the holy grail of football that is the Stoke City dressing room. 

Premier League Pragmatism

As an Arsenal fan with strong links to Rangers when my football interest goes north of the border, I knew all about Daniel Cousin. The mercurial striker brought Rangers fans much frustration and I had a hunch that Fate would give me a neatly wrapped present. Unlike some slightly naive Arsenal fans, I was not expecting a walkover when Hull visited the Emirates. Just like our good old man of steel Kolo Toure, I am more nervous about games against the likes of Hull than games against the rest of the Big Four.