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England's first XI

Oooh the tension. On Sunday, the England selectors will name a dozen men for next week's first Test squad and as I'm flying out to Munich this afternoon to cover the rowing World Cup, blogging may be light this weekend so here goes my pre-emptive strike.

Openers It is pretty much agreed that Andrew Strauss and Alastair Cook will be opening this summer, despite Cook and Michael Vaughan doing well enough over the winter. Strauss has been in ok-ish form this season (a huge one-day hundred, one fifty and six scores between 12 and 49), Cook rather less so (one fifty in six innings) but they would be my opening pair too. In a recent poll, most of you agreed - though it was interesting to see that Rob Key got almost as many votes as Vaughan.

Middle order If Vaughan is playing (and despite a poor start to the season he presumably is in) then he will be No 3, with Kevin Pietersen (a hundred in his only innings this year) indelibly inked in. I'd play KP at No 4 rather than No 5. Ian Bell has been doing what Bell always does and making good starts without converting them. For Warwickshire in first-class cricket this season he has made 41, 62, 43 and 48. I'm not sure if that is frustrating or promising, but he gets my nod and no doubt the selectors' at No 5. So far, so predictable. Now we hit difficulty.

Wicketkeeper Let's skip past the man at No 6 and confirm the keeper. Tim Ambrose is in possession after a good start for England in New Zealand and if he wasn't already in for this summer's first series he should be after making 156* against Leicestershire. But his four other innings have been low and I'm not convinced he could hold a place just as a top-six batsman, so he has to go in at No 7. Personally I'd like to see Chris Read in the place - he has scores of 142, 53* and 42 to his credit this season - but I suspect I've lost that argument. Apparently he can't bat.

No 6 Well this is the biggie. Forty-five per cent of you think it should still be Paul Collingwood and 21 per cent want Mark Ramprakash. I'm tempted by the latter, if only because I'd like him to get his 100th hundred on his Test comeback, but I'm going to turn both down. Useful servant Colly has been, but I don't think he has been worth his place for some time. It is 20 innings since his last Test hundred and his highest score in that time has been 66. For Durham this season he has scores of 25, 0, 2, 0 and 3. That is not good enough.

So who should come in? The leading run-scorer this season is Stephen Moore of Worcs, but he's an opener. Ravi Bopara is close behind and would be a contender for No 6, as he offers a bit of bowling, too. Luke Wright, like Bopara, has two hundreds already this season and can bowl. I'd go for one of them, which means bad luck again for Owais Shah. If he'd made runs yesterday against the New Zealanders, he might have been in. Instead, he made 3.

Flintoff No. His batting is appalling, while his bowling is apparently rather good. But he wouldn't be up to playing at No 6 and I don't think Ambrose is either. You could play Bopara at 6, Flintoff at 7 and Read at 8, which would be enticing. But Flintoff should only play if his ankle is up to bowling 20 overs in day as part of a four-man attack. There is no need to risk him against New Zealand. If he is still going well by the South Africa part of the summer, then he should be in.

Spinner Has to be Monty Panesar despite a mixed winter that ended quite well. Adil Rashid has not started too well this season and his strength - being a possible No 6 or No 7 batsman - has not been in evidence. Gareth Batty is bowling well for Worcestershire and will put pressure on Monty and - here's a leftfield suggestion - Saqlain Mushtaq has taken 13 wickets at an average of 19 this season and is now England-qualified. He is only 31 and should be hitting his prime. I'm tempted, very tempted but suspect that Monty will - and should - be given the nod.

Quicks Ryan Sidebottom is a certainty and if Flintoff is not to be risked that leaves room for three others, of whom two will be picked. Hoggard has to be one. He has proved in county cricket that he is still up for it and will let no one down. Stuart Broad would be another after impressing in New Zealand. James Anderson has probably earned the final slot after taking ten wickets at an average of 13 so far this season, but I wouldn't mind seeing Graham Onions in the mix. He swings the ball well and would be an admirable understudy for Hoggard or Sidebottom if either were injured.

So... Probable XI: Strauss, Cook, Vaughan, Pietersen, Bell, Collingwood, Ambrose, Broad, Sidebottom, Anderson, Panesar. In other words, no change bar the opening pair from the winter. I'd play Bopara instead of Collingwood and Hoggard instead of Anderson. And warn Cook, Vaughan and Bell that they owe a few big scores if they want to play against South Africa. And what about Saqlain Mushtaq...

Who hasn't been tapped up by the IPL?

Can I just make it clear for the record that I have not been asked to play in the IPL? Just thought I'd mention it as everyone else seems to be desperate to tell the world that they have been approached and turned it down. It started with Ali Brown, then Mark Ramprakash and then in the past day and a half we have had Ravi Bopara, Saj Mahmood and Luke Wright, left, all issuing statements that they have been approached by the IPL and said no. I almost expect Tuffers or Gatt to tell us that they were also tapped up.

Excuse my cynicism, but this has a whiff of agents wanting to hyperpromote their clients so that they can negotiate better sponsorship deals. Being on the fringe of England selection isn't sexy enough, but being someone who turned down the IPL, well that could earn you a few extra thousand from some bat manufacturer or clothing company.

I have no doubt that the five above were all genuinely approached by the IPL (although the league would hardly issue a denial). I understand Lalit Modi had the names of a couple of dozen English players that he wanted to tempt - but you do have to wonder whether the IPL's interest went any farther than a modest inquiry. The way these denials have been spun, you'd have thought that they were all on the verge of taking strike in Bangalore before deciding not to.

Let's be serious here: for all the merits of Mahmood, Wright and Bopara, it is hard to see any Indian franchise paying more for them than the $100,000 that Rajasthan paid for Dimitri Mascarenhas, the only England player out there. Most of their budgets were blown in the first auction in February, at which point the English players weren't available, and with a limit on four overseas players per match, clubs aren't going to splash out on benchwarmers. Just ask Mascarenhas, who hasn't played a game yet.

So, in pounds that makes a possible earning this year of about £50,000. Then take away 10 per cent in agents' fees and 40 per cent in tax and you are left with barely £30,000, but that is pro rata and Mascarenhas, who is only out there for two weeks, won't receive even that. Still not bad money for very little work, but announcing that you had turned the IPL down could be worth more money in extra sponsorship than signing up. And it doesn't pee off the England selectors. Shrewd, very shrewd.

Should Andrew Flintoff be selected for the New Zealand Test series?

Dodgy ankles, pedaloes and booze have filled the headlines over the past couple of years whenever Andrew Flintoff's name has been mentioned. But with the first Test against New Zealand only a week away, the selectors have a slightly more pressing concern: form.

Freddie lasted one ball in his innings for Lancashire against Durham yesterday - his second golden duck in consecutive matches. This fact is not lost on Michael Atherton who, in today's column, writes: "Since the Ashes series of 2005, Andrew Flintoff has played 14 Test matches and he hasn’t scored a hundred or taken a five-for. He has played a further eleven first-class matches (before yesterday's game at Old Trafford) and again hasn’t scored a hundred or taken a five-for."

Atherton declares: "For his own sake, and for the good of the team, he shouldn’t be picked."

Ah, but Athers hasn't had to face him. Here's what a few that have have said:

Stuart Law, Flintoff’s county captain: "If you think you can leave him out of any England side when he’s fit, you’re kidding yourself"

Justin Langer: "Flintoff could bat at number 11 if it meant playing him. He must play in England’s first eleven"

Marcus Trescothick: "bowling-wise he’s as ready as he’ll ever be. He’s ready to go"

But is he? Are we Englanders living in a hazy fog where Flintoff is still the same player of three years ago? Are we that badly off for players that a man with no form and a suspect foot is our only choice?

Or is his bowling ability alone worth a gamble? Has he done enough with the ball recently to merit a chance, knowing that time at the crease will allow his batting to come up to scratch?

What do you think: should Flintoff be selected for the New Zealand Test series? Vote now and leave your comments below.

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Wickets galore

It's a bowler's paradise in the County Championship today. Despite there being glorious sun over most of the country, none of the batsmen seem to want to stay out in it. Consider these scores, all of them on day 1 of the match: At Old Trafford, Lancashire 143 all out (first-ball duck for Flintoff; Mark Davies 7-33, Collingwood 2-16 and, just to buck the trend, S Harmison 1-49. Retirement can't come soon enough...), Durham 114 all out (Anderson 4-18, Flintoff 4-21); At Trent Bridge, Notts 202 all out, Kent 33-4 (having been five for four; Sidebottom has figures of 6-2-8-3); At Taunton, Somerset 126 all out (James Tomlinson 8-46), Hampshire 194-3 (bucking the trend thanks to Pietersen's 100 but they were 3-2); At Derby, Derbyshire 270 all out (a recovery from 128-7), Warwickshire 14-0; and at Chelmsford, Middlesex 263-7 (Strauss 88, Nel 0-61)

So that's five games and 64 wickets that fell in one day. Fantastic to see for those of us fed up with it being a batsman's game (and just to complete the effect, Rajasthan bowled out for 103 in the IPL, too).

Sir Richard Hadlee on the IPL/ICL

Sir Richard Hadlee has criticised New Zealand Cricket for allowing the five players involved in the Indian Premier League to arrive late for their tour of England. Daniel Vettori, Brendon McCullum, Jacob Oram, Kyle Mills and Ross Taylor arrived in England last Wednesday, having missed the first two tour matches because they were cashing in their chips in India instead.

Speaking to promote Sky Sports' coverage of the Test series, which starts on May 15, Hadlee, the chairman of selectors, told me: "I made my thoughts well known to New Zealand Cricket. I felt that the tour starts the day the players assemble and while I understand and accept the decision made - the compromise with the players - it wasn't a good look arriving in this county without the captain and vice-captain."

Hadlee called for a window in the international schedule to allow the IPL to be played, or failing that he said that it must be made clear that international players have to be released for their full duties rather than arriving mid-tour. "International players have to be available for their countries," he said. "You can't blame the players for wanting to be in the IPL - gosh, look the money is very attractive for not a lot of work and effort - but the global game has to survive and not be compromised. There needs to be a total understanding that once international commitments are there either you are a part of it or not.
These guys will pick up the money next year as there isn't a conflict."

New Zealand have also lost several first-choice players who opted to play in the unauthorised Indian Cricket League. Shane Bond, Lou Vincent, Craig MacMillan and Daryl Tuffey may all have played on this tour and Hadlee complained that "the ICL is eroding our player base".

Another player missing for at least the first part of the tour is Jesse Ryder, the 23-year-old wild child who is quite a talent when he's not slashing open his hand trying to break into lavatories. "Jesse has had some issues that have probably kept him back but we've bitten the bullet on him," Hadlee said. "He's got talent and we thought when we brought him back that he would grow in the environment. He knows in no uncertain terms that if there is another breach of behaviour issues... well, you'd think he'd want to toe the line. He can play and has got lovely hands - well, one's damaged - but he can hit the ball well."

Andre Nel's frustrated

I promise to stop leaving posts about a) Essex and b) Andre Nel (for a few days at least) but you'd hardly expect me to leave out this gem from James Foster's blog. Apparently, during a rain-affected match at Taunton last season, the Essex players tried various board games in their hotel and got hooked on Frustration, a sort of Ludo game from the 1980s with the dice trapped inside a large "popper".

They loved it so much they bought the game off the hotel for a fiver and it is now a regular part of the Essex dressing-room entertainments, making a nice change from poker and computer games. Foster then has this to say:

"Some of our boys end up spewing over that game because frustration really is the operative word. It's all down to the luck of the dice so the boys can get very upset. Andre Nel seems to be the 'King of Frustration' in the Essex dressing-room but that's only because there is no skill involved in the game! Andre's always very quiet when he's not winning but when he's going well he shouts and screams uncontrollably."

I admit that comes as something of a surprise to me. Always had Andre down as a cribbage man.

The wisdom of Alastair Cook

Alastair Cook was in philosophical mood after his innings at Chelmsford today. He was asked about the likelihood that he will open the batting for England with Andrew Strauss this summer, rather than Michael Vaughan, and it was pointed out that Strauss/Cook had not been a success before, with no hundred partnerships in 27 innings together. Cook's response was telling:

"The fact we didn't do well is we both kept getting out. If we both keep scoring runs then the partnerships just happen."

So now you know.

Cook searches for runs

Happy Bank Holiday to my English readers; get back to work to the rest of you. Here at sunny Chelmsford it is the final day of Essex v the New Zealanders and I drove down the A12 this morning with high hopes of a cracking 90 overs. Essex needed 248 runs with nine wickets in hand after Jason Gallian was out in the final over last night. Apart from how the New Zealanders bowl, the interesting thing is how Alastair Cook bats against them.

Cook's form is almost as concerning as Michael Vaughan's before the Test series starts on May 15. Since returning from his winter tours, Cook has scored 27, 21 and 15 in first-class cricket and 8 in a one-day match. He was dropped at slip last night before he scored, so his slow pace this morning is understandable.

As I type, Cook is on 36 off 90 balls and rather scratching around for his runs. Fingers crossed that he finds his groove soon. UPDATE: Cook was out for 57 in the end. In addition to the dropped catch on nought, he was close to being run out and survived a good leg-before appeal before chipping a tame catch to mid off. Essex wobbling on 141-6 now.

Meanwhile, Essex have reacted angrily to a suggestion in The Observer newspaper that "you cannot even get a coffee for love or loose change" at the County Ground. Perhaps peeved at their ground also being called "nondescript" by Will Buckley, the county actually put out a press release observing that while you might not be able to get a hot beverage for love, you can certainly get one for loose change. The press officer then points out that there is an abundance of free tea and coffee in the press box, "albeit without a maid service on-hand". Ouch.

Anyway, Buckley has caused some amusement in the press box after another piece on snooker in which he admitted making "six crucial errors in three column inches". The most hilarious was referring to how snooker players were looking younger all the time, only to have it pointed out to him that he was watching the junior event. Oh well, we all make mistakes and I'm as guilty as any (as readers of this blog will know) but I'll try to keep myself to just one per column inch.

"Pick me or I retire"

What to make of Stephen Harmison's comments in the Mail on Sunday today? Despite protesting his love of Durham and his respect for county cricket, Harmison says that if England don't pick him then he'll probably walk away from the game. "If I felt that my chance of doing that [playing for England] was gone, the probability is that I'd retire from first-class cricket altogether," he said.

Harmison goes on to emhasise that this is not an ultimatum but you have to wonder at his attitude. Yes, playing international cricket has to be the pinnacle of any leading player's ambitions, but surely the answer is to prove you are worth it by making the case at a lower level. Harmison has been dropped by England because his best form was gone - or appeared too rarely. He does not appear to want to have to put in the hard slog and earn his place. Four wickets in 38 overs in his two games for Durham this season is a start but he is hardly bashing down the door for a recall, as Matthew Hoggard is for Yorkshire.

The experience of Ryan Sidebottom shows that it can be worth it to plug away in county cricket for a while. At 29, Harmison has a few years on his side. The odd thing is that he says that he wouldn't mind serving his time if he was 34 as he could pass things on to younger players, but he is not prepared just to be a 30-year-old county pro.

Harmison has long struck me as not enjoying his cricket. If that is the case, then perhaps he should just give up now and walk away from the game. He will never flourish for England if he doesn't relish playing. He should be demanding the ball at every opportunity; if he can't get that desire playing for Durham - against lesser batsmen, as well - then why does he think he can persuade people that he will want to bowl for England?

And if he does retire from the game, what would be the ideal next career for him?

Injuries mount

Just after lunch at Chelmsford in the tour match between New Zealand and Essex and the Kiwis are struggling again with the bat. 85 for five at the moment and that is effectively for six as Daniel Vettori, I have been told, will not bat today after having two stitches put into his spinning finger, which he cut on Saturday. This should not stop him playing in the first Test, but he may miss next week's final warm-up game against the Lions.

Aaron Redmond, usually an opener, came out to bat at No 7 after being told by the umpires that he could not bat until five wickets had fallen as a result of missing most of yesterday's fielding. His reason for being off the field was rather odd: during New Zealand's warm-up yesterday he slid to stop the ball and somehow managed to ram the spikes of one of his boots into a knee.

Meanwhile, the star Essex bowler today, Maurice Chambers, has had his own injury problems. When he got Ross Taylor to chop on to his stumps this morning, it was Chambers's first first-class wicket for three years. To be fair to him, this was also his first first-class game for three years having suffered from various back ailments. Just to prove what he can do, he then took Daniel Flynn's wicket shortly after lunch.

New Zealanders at Chelmsford

I'm at Chelmsford for Essex v the New Zealanders as the touring side tinker before the first Test on May 15. I was here on Friday as well but my laptop spent most of the day in the repair shop so apologies for a lack of blogging. I'll make up for it today.

The story so far in this match is that New Zealand looked pretty average when they were batting against a fairly unthreatening Essex attack, with the exception of James Marshall, who last played a Test three years ago and looks to have earned his recall to step into Stephen Fleming's shoes after making 128 on Friday. By happy coincidence, his twin brother Hamish was scoring his own hundred at almost exactly the same time - and off only five balls more - in Bristol for Gloucestershire.

Hamish won't be playing for New Zealand this summer after taking the ICL's shilling, but New Zealand's five IPL players, in their first game back in real cricket, did not impress with the bat. McCullum, Oram, Taylor, Vettori and Mills made just 64 runs between them, Vettori's 22 the pick. A last-wicket stand of 59 helped New Zealand to 355.

In reply, Essex also struggled, with Michael Mason, who has played one Test, the pick of the bowlers, taking four for 65. Chris Martin and Tim Southee are likely to return for the Test but Mason may yet earn one of the slots. Alastair Cook's rotten form with the bat continued, making 15, while Ravi Bopara's hot streak is such that his 66, Essex's top score in an innings of 258, seems a relative failure. Their second best score was 41 by Alex Tudor, a long-forgotten former England bowler who made his highest Test batting score of 99 not out against New Zealand back in 1999. His bowling lacks something these days after a long stream of injuries, but he is only 30 and may yet have more achievements in him.

April's Hero of the Month

As always on the first day of the month, I offset the cynicism and mockery of the previous day's Pillock Poll by offering a vote on who has turned in an impressive performance in the previous four weeks of so. And generally that poll gets far fewer votes than the one for fools and eejits, which proves some sort of point. Anyway, the previous heroes in this poll have been Adam Gilchrist, the England women and Ryan Sidebottom. Who will join them from this list of three bowlers and three batsmen?

Ravi Bopara Yes, I admit I'm a cheerleader for the Essex all-rounder but his early-season form is proof that sometimes being dropped by England can help your career. In four completed innings for Essex this season he has made 499 runs, with two centuries and a 99, and he has two chances to earn his England spot back tomorrow against the New Zealanders at Chelmsford and for England Lions against the same opponents next week.

Shivnarine Chanderpaul Ten runs needed for the West Indies to beat Sri Lanka with one wicket in hand and two balls remaining - and Chaminda Vaas, no slouch, bowling them. Chanderpaul is not fazed: he smears a four through mid-off and then wallops a full toss for six. Easy.

Matthew Hoggard Like Bopara, he has responded well to being dropped by England. In his first game for Yorkshire, he took eight wickets against Hampshire, with six for 57 in the first innings, to set up an innings win. Gets bonus points too for his contempt for one-day cricket. After not being selected for Yorkshire's next 50-over game, Hoggy said: "The white ball can take a jump as far as I'm concerned. It means I can spend the day with my family instead of watching the rain."

Brendon McCullum His innings of 158 off 73 balls for Kolkata in the first IPL match eventually became rather dull as six followed yet another six, but as far as making your mark in the most expensive event in cricket history goes, the New Zealander wicketkeeper grasped his chance and throttled it. He has been nominated for this once before, losing the the England women.

Glenn McGrath and Mohammad Asif For reminding those watching the IPL that it's not just about big-hitting. In eight overs together for Delhi against Deccan Chargers, McGrath and Asif conceded just 41 runs against the supposedly explosive likes of Gilchrist and Symonds. McGrath even had a maiden - bringing his tally to a tournament-leading two in four matches. Might is keeping it tight, as they don't say in the IPL.

Dale Steyn Back to the start of the month for this one and Steyn's cheap five-for, conceding 23 runs, helped to bowl India out for 76 in, rather appropriately for this day and age, precisely 20 overs and continue. But this wasn't a Twenty20 game or even an ODI, but a Test match. It is rare to see bowlers destroy a batting line-up, so Steyn definitely is worth considering.

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Northants catch the selector's eye

I'm at Northampton today - "Described as the Naples of the Midlands - as often as Naples is called the Northampton of Lombardy," as the recently departed Humphrey Lyttelton once said - and the home side have made a pig's ear of their first innings. From 33-1 overnight, they were 33-4 by the time I entered the press box five minutes' late, seven down at lunch and bowled out for 168 soon afterwards. As I type Worcestershire are 50 without loss in reply. Which leads to a convenient reminder about Times Online's session-by-session reports from all our writers in the field, which you can read here.

The match is being watched by Geoff Miller, the National Selector, although I'm not sure who he was wanting to see. Monty Panesar is the big draw but at the start of the day it didn't seem likely that he'd bowl until well after tea. Maybe Miller has seen Northants bat before and had an inkling. Of the other possible England candidates, Kabir Ali (surely well down the fast bowler's pecking order now) took three wickets and Steven Davies, the promising young Worcs keeper, held six catches. Despite that, it is more or less a given that Tim Ambrose will be the England keeper this summer.

April's Pillock of the Month

Thought I'd forgotten? Today's the final day of the month and, as happened on the last day of January, February and March, it's time to highlight the absurdities and silliness of cricket with our regular Pillock of the Month poll. Following in the clown-shaped footsteps of Andrew Symonds, Jesse Ryder and Stephen Harmison, here are a half-dozen hapless loons who made headlines for the wrong reasons this month. Pick the biggest pillock.

Adidas For getting rid of the traditional cable-knit woollen sweater that has been worn by England cricketers since time immemorial. Yes, the new England kit looks rather good and, yes, the new ClimaCool sweater will probably make them more comfortable and, indeed, could make them better players. But surely standards have to be upheld?

The Canadian women's team Given a stonking 81 wides and 11 other extras in a one-day match against Trinidad and Tobago, Canada still couldn't win. Not really pillocks as such, but pretty hopeless.

Carl Hopkinson Not a household name to many of our readers but the Sussex batsman committed the cardinal sin for an opener of being run out twice in the same game, against Kent. The first was the silliest, being run out going for an overthrow off a ricochet, but it was perhaps rash to run a risky single in the second innings.

Mohammad Shafiq, a Mohammad Yousuf "lookalike" who tried to use his resemblance to the Pakistan batsman to gain access to the home dressing-room at Multan during a one-day international with Bangladesh. Just one flaw: the real MoYo was fielding at the time, a fact that hadn't escaped the security staff's attention.

Harbhajan Singh Asked to captain Mumbai Indians in place of the legendary Sachin Tendulkar, not only does he lead his team to three straight losses (not wholly his fault admittedly) but then he goes and slaps an opponent, Sreesanth, after the third. Banned for the rest of this year's IPL

The West Indies outfitters. Against Sri Lanka in a one-day international this month, Jerome Taylor came out to field with his name spelt "Tayrol" on his back. Furthermore, Devon Smith had clearly mislaid his shirt as he fielded for all 50 overs with a fair bit of masking tape obscuring the rather long name of Sewnarine Chattergoon, the replacement player who had lent him his.

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Cry baby

I've just come across this quote from Sreesanth on why he started blubbing like a girl after being whacked by Harbhajan on Friday:

"It was like a WWF punch and I was so shocked that I started crying."

Now excuse me for pointing this out but I thought the whole point of the World Wrestling Federation (which I think has been recently rebranded as the WWE in any case) was that the punches were faked? Did Harbhajan shape to thump Sreesanth and instead just slap his own left hand to make it sound like he'd clocked Sreesanth one? In which case, did the fast bowler burst into tears because he expected more?

Or is he actually referring to the other WWF and was suggesting that Harbhajan punches like a panda? In which case, how surreal.

Nel threatened with ban

The shy and retiring Andre Nel, a favourite of this blog, has played only four games for Essex so far this season but already he is two thirds of the way to a ban after picking up six penalty points under the ECB code of conduct during last week's match against Derbyshire.

Gentle Andre was reported by the umpires for two separate breaches of the code, one for using language or a gesture that is obscene or insulting and one for throwing the ball at a player or official in an inappropriate manner. Both are believed to have involved Steve Stubbings, who was struck on the legs in anger by Nel, although it is more than possible that Nel was actually aiming at the stumps.

Should he pick up another black mark, Nel will face an immediate suspension, something not to have happened to anyone since the ECB brought in the penalty points system. The dilemma, though, is that he only has five more games this season before giving way to Danish Kaneria. If he hasn't found some way of being reprimanded before his final game, against Middlesex, then his fans will feel rather let down. Mind you, with only 16 runs conceded in five overs, Nel was the main reason Essex beat Sussex yesterday.

Bread and board

Matthew Hayden, as regular readers of L&L may recall, is a bit of a dab hand with an egg whisk and a wok. In fact, he loves cookery almost as much as he likes accumulating Test hundreds and dreaming about wrenching out Harbhajn Singh's appendix the hard way. And there is no reason why Hayden would let his IPL obligations get in the way of expanding his culinary horizons, as this story reveals. Hayden was in Madras recently and popped into the Sheraton to cook lobster curry and a potato/onions combo that he calls The Masala.

The most interesting revelation, however, is hidden away at the bottom of the piece. Hayden, it is claimed, never goes on a tour without packing his breadmaker. While other cricketers spend their down-time on the PlayStation or with a pack of cards, Hayden is always working on a new recipe for a walnut and raisin loaf or perhaps trying to get the right consistency for his bagels.

In fact, it is probably fair to say that if you asked Hayden about the dough he could make in the IPL, he would assume that you were referring to the new ghee-based bread-making opportunities rather than the vast pay packets.

Opening up

Last Monday, I asked who should be England's No 6 for the forthcoming Test series against New Zealand and the answer, fairly conclusively, was that Paul Collingwood should stay in the job. Mark Ramprakash was your second favourite and Owais Shah your third. Few takers for Andrew Flintoff, who continues to look good with the ball and poor with the bat, or Ravi Bopara despite a run of form that has given him 499 runs in four completed innings for Essex.

This week, who should be England's opening pair? In the main this has been a settled area in recent years with Trescothick/Vaughan a successful pairing for 52 innings (averaging 52.35 runs together per stand), followed by Trescothick/Strauss for a similar period of time (average 48.76) and then Cook/Strauss and Cook/Vaughan (although oddly they have never tried Vaughan/Strauss).

Cook/Vaughan, the pairing over the winter, put on two hundred-partnerships in 12 innings together but the overall average is a slightly disappointing 44 given the opposition, while Cook/Strauss, a combination in 27 Test innings, averages 35.22 with no hundred partnerships.

One combination I imagine everyone has forgotten is Key/Vaughan, who had three innings together of 56, 67 and 28 against India in 2002. With Key back in the England development squad, might he be an option as an opener, rather than as first wicket down as he has generally been used? He made 178 not out today against the New Zealanders. There was also Bell/Strauss in one 2006 Test against India, where they made 52 and 9.

Who else would be in contention? Ed Joyce and Michael Carberry did well on the England Lions winter tour but with only 147 runs in five innings and 37 in four respectively this season they are hardly pushing their case, while those at the top of the early averages are surely too young (Mark Pettini) or too old (Mark Butcher) to be considered and in any case both, while former openers, are more at home lower down the order.

Have a vote, but if you do think it should be someone else, click on "comments" at the bottom of this post and let me know who I missed.

Opinion Polls & Market Research

An antidote to Twenty20

Nice to see that in these days of big-hitting not everyone wants to welcome the joy of six. The Sunday Telegraph has a front-page short story today about Harrogate Cricket Club, where players have been told that if they hit a six they will automatically be given out, after complaints from residents of the houses near the ground.

A slap in the face

Hilarious goings-on in India this weekend and (would you believe it?) Harbhajan Singh is again at the centre of a row. Apparently - and this is still under investigation - Harbhajan, the captain of the Mumbai Indians, took exception to being told "hard luck" by Sreesanth, his India team-mate who was playing for the victorious Punjab Kings XI in their IPL match, and Bhaji, model of sanity and decorum that he is, responded by slapping him one under an eye.

Sreesanth was later seen in tears. Although Harbhajan went to the dressing-room and apologised, he has been suspended pending an inquiry tomorrow and could face an ICC punishment even though this is a domestic tournament. Violence towards another player carries a possible ban of five Tests or ten ODIs.

This is hardly a first offence by Harbhajan, the obnoxious little weed, as Matthew Hayden called him, but there seems some irony in Sreesanth being the subject of his assault. The fast bowler is one of the most aggressive on the world stage, who is not above petulant staring, shoving or temper tantrums, which is a shame because he is also a fine bowler. If violence was to break out between two Indians, it would probably be those two: they have form after Harbhajan gave Sreesanth a volley of abuse for dropping a catch off him in the recent Test series.

Scyld Berry, the new Editor of Wisden Cricketers' Almanack, has written of his fear that cricket is becoming more violent and that an assault will happen on the pitch at some point. How the BCCI, IPL and ICC respond to Harbhajan's latest action will say much about how they view it. Personally, I'd stick Harbhajan in a boxing ring with Sreesanth, Hayden and Andrew Symonds and let them sort out their grievances that way. I'm not sure that for all his big talk Harbhajan would last more than a couple of rounds.