Line and Length - Times Online - WBLG

MoYo gains record

He needed 46, in the end he made 124 before being bowled by Ramnaresh Sarwan (dodgy against spin, you see). So Mohammad Yousuf's record-breaking year ended with him on 1,788 runs, 78 more than Viv Richards's 30-year-old record. Congratulations to the bearded wonder.

The fascinating thing is that if you look at Cricinfo's gallery of Yousuf's year in pictures, he began 2006 with just a touch of Indiana Jones-style stubble and had ended with the sort of chin bush that Saeed Anwar would be proud of. Maybe England should also start growing their beards in the hope of improved batting success?

England need a good tosser

Most games start off with the toss of a coin. A test of skill and will needs, it seems, a contest of pure luck to kick-start it. But mostly it doesn’t really matter who wins this initial contest, it’s just a way of getting the damn thing going.

McGrath 50:50 for Test

Glenn McGrath is rated no better than a 50:50 chance for the second Test in Adelaide on Friday owing to the badly bruised heel he sustained in Brisbane. McGrath required a pain-killing injection to get him through the England second innings there but has not been able to bowl in the nets since. He will have to pass a fitness test on the morning of the match.

Gatting wins the Ashes - again

England's golden oldies, captained by Mike Gatting, won the Masters Ashes after beating Old Australia, led by Kim Hughes, in a thrilling finish at Chateau Tanunda in the Barossa Valley near Adelaide. Set 267 to win in what was a 32-over affair, Robin Smith steered England home by four wickets with 102 off 72 balls.

MoYo goes for Sir Viv's record

Some things matter more than the Ashes. In Karachi tomorrow morning, Mohammad Yousuf will walk out to bat for Pakistan knowing that he needs just 46 runs to break one of cricket's most powerful and enduring records. Resuming on 1 not out, Yousuf needs to reach 47 in order to pass Viv Richards's record of 1,710 runs in a calendar year. If he does so, he will also make Pakistan, who are effectively 174 for two in their second innings against West Indies, strong favourites to win the third Test and take the series 2-0.

Ashes match in the Barossa

Mike Gatting is captaining an Old England XI against a Kim Hughes-led Old Australia XI in the Barossa Valley today, the Masters Ashes being at stake. The match, which is being staged at the Chateau Tanunda winery's ground, is being contested for the Masters Ashes - and a replica urn made from Barossa wood more than 100 years old. All proceeds are going to the David Hookes Foundation, which works to raise awareness of organ donation.

England take positives from major malfunction

So there I was, sitting in a horrid place, which is many miles from the place I need to be professionally, trying to make my laptop start. It totally and utterly refused. My hotel has plenty of class, all of it third. It is in the wrong place, and I am staying in it with malfunctioning equipment. Still, I thought, at the end of the day there’s a lot of positives I can take from this.

Harmison keeps improving

England followers around the globe will be pleased to hear that Steve Harmison completed an encouraging net session at the Adelaide Oval on Wednesday. After his nightmare in Brisbane, Harmison's pace, direction and length were all consistently good. The only caveat was that England's spearhead also bowled well in the nets prior to Brisbane.

Heavenly Adelaide

What a relief to be in Adelaide after Brisbane, my least favourite Australian city. I think the England party are of the same view. After the stultifyingly hot and humid Queensland capital with its officious police, architecturally dull city centre, soulless concrete cricket stadium (I refuse to call it a ground), we now find ourselves in the City of Churches, with its dry heat, its beautiful cricket ground, lovely old buildings, plethora of parks and jacarandas in full blossom. And I haven't even mentioned the magnificent wine that is produced an hour or two's drive from Adelaide - plenty more on that later.

Getting to see everyday beauty

The everyday is exotic too: at least, it is if you find yourself in an unfamiliar place. The humdrum stuff of ordinary life is sometimes - often - a vivid revelation to the stranger. Perhaps that is what tourism really means: a chance to thrill at the utterly normal.

Vaughan to play Wednesday

While England had a closed net session in Adelaide on Tuesday afternoon, they received some excellent news from Perth that Michael Vaughan will play on Wednesday for the ECB Academy against a Western Australia 2nd XI in a one-day match. The Ashes-winning England captain has made a quicker-than-expected recovery from his latest knee operation and hopes to be fit for the triangular one-day series in January, possibly even sooner.

"Nothing to crow about"

Yes, that's the self-congratulatory headline on the front page of the Brisbane Courier Mail this morning. "Nothing to crow about" screams the tabloid next door to a portrait photo of a Barmy Army fan wearing a pair of St George dark glasses and a funny hat to match. The Aussies, the paper reminds us, made 804 runs and took 20 wickets, while England managed just 527 and 10.

Aussies warn: more of the same

A demoralising first Test defeat against the old antiopodean enemy is hard enough to stomach for those of us who stayed up through the night to watch back in Blighty, but imagine what it must be like for the English fans Down Under who have to try and come to terms with as one-sided an Ashes match as - fingers crossed - you are likely to see.

You can't take the weather with you

I looked out of my hotel window in the morning and saw clouds. Proper clouds. For the first time since I had arrived in Brisbane, a town racked by horrendous drought, the sky was not a remorseless blue. There were clouds dark and heavy, but pretty high. And I wondered if God had a sense of humour in Australia. Rain! What a glorious feeling, what an absolutely hilarious concept.

I thought long and hard: should I bring my umbrella? I knew that if I did so, CMJ would say “You wise virgin.” Was it good luck, to bring a brolly? Or, on the other hand, was it very bad luck? I decided that umbrella-carrying brought a good, serious matter-of fact response to the business of rain and I slipped it into my bag with my temperamental and vindictive laptop.

View from the sofa - the final part

1.30am: And that is the end of the Test; Harmison sweeping Clark to fine leg to end the innings on 370. Australia win by 277 runs, stuffing England like a turkey. Congratulations to them, particularly to Ponting, a deserving man of the match. Are there many comforts England can take from this? They batted for 100 overs second time round and are capable, if they win the toss at Adelaide, of posting a challenging first-innings score, but I can't see this bowling attack dismissing Australia twice.

For more detailed analysis, check timesonline.co.uk/ashes later and look out for CMJ's video report around lunchtime as well as the usual comment and news in the run-up to the second Test, which starts on December 1. From me, it's good night.

Noise pollution

Another post from Nigel Henderson, holidaying with the England fans:

"Cricket Australia and the Queensland Police may, between them, have silenced the Barmy Army bugler, but it seems that most other forms of noise are welcome at the Gabba. There is barely a moment of quiet to be had in this bowl of a stadium, with loud adverts being emitted by a scoreboard that is heavily disguised as a giant television screen, offensive songs being blasted at an unsuspecting England public during the tea interval by an officially-sanctioned guitar duo and the start of the series, last Thursday, being marked or despoiled, depending on your point of view, by The Young Divas, a girl group reinterpreting the national anthems as Lionel Richie love songs. Since when did an Ashes series demand an opening ceremony anyway?

Jones and Giles: your country needs you

A potentially interesting final day lies ahead in Brisbane with one simple equation: 90 overs v five wickets, which will run out first? You'd have to make Australia strong favourites, but perhaps this is where Duncan Fletcher's decision to plump for Ashley Giles and Geraint Jones pays off. He chose them over more talented players on the grounds that they could bat well; we need each of them to occupy the crease for three hours or so to survive.

Kevin Pietersen must also shoulder the burden. He did well yesterday but he must give himself the challenge of making a maiden double hundred. If anyone can save a game by sheer refusal to give in, it is KP.

One element of hope: Billy Bowden, the eccentric umpire who suffers from arthritis (it's why he can't straighten his index finger), has said that he is creaking quite a bit, which usually indicates that rain is on its way. The Australian Bureau of Meteorology has the forecast "mostly fine with possible late afternoon thunderstorm". Well, we can but dream.

View from the sofa - part 4

3.25am: Blast. Shane Warne ends that partnership, Mike Hussey snaring a catch at short leg from Alastair Cook, out for 43. A good knock but he needed to stay there another 40 or more overs. I can see Australia winning this today, even though Glenn McGrath is off the field with an injury.

I think on that note I might turn in for the night. To keep updated, visit The Times's over-by-over commentary, with analysis from Geoffrey Dean.

3.15am: Collingwood cuts Warne for four to bring up England's first partnership of 50 runs this series. Australia, by contrast, have had 12 partnerships this match and eight of them have amassed 50 or more - usually a lot more - runs.

Another ill omen

Ron Lewis, the Times's boxing writer and a keen follower of the turf, e-mails with even more grim news. Apparently, Flintoff, a horse part-owned by the England captain, was beaten by a short head in the 12:45 at Towcester earlier today. The horse entered the straight looking as if he had won at a canter but got gradually pegged back and came second.

I'm not sure what would bother Andrew Flintoff more: that his racehorse came second or that his thoroughbred bowlers look like such donkeys.

Pitch battles

It's the pitch's fault, naturally. Flat as a pancake for most of the first two days, it then got riddled with massive cracks around tea-time on day 2, making it nearly unplayable, and then, mysteriously, it suddenly became a perfect batting wicket again at tea-time on day 3. How strange.

View from the sofa - part 3

2am: And that's lunch, with England on 118 for five, just 484 behind. Good grief. England did not need to lose two wickets in close succession and even though one Sky commentator tried to mitigate (Pietersen's lbw may have missed off stump while Flintoff may have been caught of a no-ball), the fact remains that they were rotten shots. By contrast, Ian Bell and Geraint Jones have looked very solid and are unbeaten on 41 and 19 respectively - and they were possibly the two batsmen with the most to prove.

I think I'm going to call it a night now. Visit timesonline.co.uk/ashes for over-by-over coverage and snippets from Geoff Dean at the Gabba all through the night. I'll be back and blogging in the morning. Feel free to leave me some comments below.

01.40am: The first casualty of this series seems to be Billy Bowden's walkie-talkie after a moment of pure farce. Geraint Jones went to sweep Shane Warne; Bowden, the umpire at square leg, saw the ball coming straight for him and took evasive manoeuvres, diving to the ground like a Chelsea striker. But the ball didn't have Bowden's name on it, instead it clipped the walkie-talkie on his belt and sent it pinging off in the direction of fine leg. Bowden was shaken but not stirred.

Joke of the day

Mike, on the Flintoff's Ashes blog, asks:

"If Glenn McGrath had taken three in three, would it have been a geriatric?"

Well, you have to try and laugh at times like these, especially when Dad's Army are doing so much better than us. At least we can make jokes, the stewards at the Gabba have apparently banned things like that.

Aussies not too shy to gloat

Those of you too depressed to read the doom and gloom merchants writing off England's Ashes chances after only two days' play, should spare a thought for those Poms currently Down Under. Saturday morning's papers in Australia are predictably full of it. It's Glenn McGrath this and Ricky Ponting that, as well as tearing our boys to shreds. Perhaps Andrew Flintoff should post some of these clippings on the dressing-room wall; what better motivation could there be?

We're just not lucky

The latest email from Nigel Henderson with the fans in Brisbane:

"A public-address announcement at the Gabba orders people not to "offend, insult, disparage or humiliate (and any number of other synonyms for "upset") persons of another race. Obviously, the Cricket Australia officials failed to pass that message on to their cricketers who, on the second day,
continued to offend, insult, disparage and, in particular, humiliate, people of another race - the English. I felt all those emotions as the free hitting of Stuart Clark and Brett Lee, then the stupidity of  Andrew Strauss, hooking into the leg-side trap, brought the Ashes holders to their knees.

Save the earth - and our toilet paper

A pretty girl smiled at me in Queen Street, Brisbane the other day. There are generally two reasons why this sort of thing happens: the first is that she thinks I know her father, and the second is that she might want me to help save the Tasmanian forests. It turned out that the second one was correct.

View from the sofa - day 2

7.30am: And that is the close of play. What have we learnt? Ponting is back, McGrath is back, Warne never left, Hussey looks awesome and England look, well charitably we can say they still look rusty. Is there any chance that if this match finishes two days early we can have a two-day warm-up match afterwards?

By getting out so carelessly on 196, Ponting took his tally of runs for the year to 998, at an average of 99.8. The media use the adjective Bradmanesque with too much ease, but Ponting's form since losing the Ashes is as good as anything produced by a batsman since the great Australian retired. He evens pays homage to Bradman by having an average a cat's whisker below the perfection of 100 as if to say "I could average 100 but I'm not going to get cocky".

The only thing that England can consider is that Mohammad Yousuf, with 1500 runs at 97, is having an even better year than Ponting and England still beat Yousuf's Pakistan this summer. The series is not dead, but it looks as if this Test is.

Read Geoffrey Dean's close-of-play report on timesonline.co.uk/ashes shortly.

Wrath of Khan

Should you be in Stoke-on-Trent tomorrow night and at a loose end (and how could you be bored in the home town of Robbie Williams and Phil "The Power" Taylor?), then get down to the Kings Hall where Imran Khan is making his professional boxing debut against someone who I misread as Jimmy Stewart but is instead one Sammy Stewart.

OK, so it's not really Imran Khan the cricketer (or even Amir Khan, the boxer and cousin of Sajid Mahmood, the cricketer) but with an hour and a quarter still to go before the Test resumes in Brisbane and my consciousness levels flagging, it's as good a cricket story as you are going to get.

Imran Khan v Jimmy Stewart would be one of those fantasy fights I'd love to see, though. Khan preening himself in the corner as Stewart drawls "ah, now, look here mister, ah don't think you wanna do that". Peter Cook once advocated pro-celebrity boxing with Mike Tyson pitted against Jeffrey Archer, which has its merits, too...

Concentrate hard

In his past eight Test matches, Mohammad Yousuf, the Pakistan middle-order batsman, has had scores of 192 (twice), 191 (this morning against West Indies) and 97. Looks like someone's attention starts to wander when he nears a milestone... Any chance that Ricky Ponting also gets out as he approaches landmarks? Possibly not, despite being out on debut for 96 he has only been out in the nineties (or 190s) five further times in 175 innings.

Chin up

Let me take you back to November 22, 2003, the rugby World Cup final, England v Australia. Only six minutes into the game, Australia launch a speculative crossfield kick to the left wing where Lote Tuqiri flies in, outjumps Jason Robinson and scores the game's first try. England looked leaden-footed, bemused, there was a feeling of "here we go again". But we know what happened, England regrouped, started doing what they did best, bullied Australia and, despite some poor refereeing, won the day.

Reverses can happen early in any sporting contest. Let's not get too downbeat about England's chances in the Ashes just yet, despite suffering a Tuqiri-style hammer blow from Ricky Ponting yesterday. Here's ten reasons why we should be positive:

Tufnell spins it for Giles

Nigel Henderson, our man with the fans Down Under, sends in this snippet of intelligence:

"I can now reveal the real reason behind Ashley Giles's selection over Monty Panesar: a meeting on a cruise boat between those two giants of left-arm spin sorcery, Phil Tufnell and David Graveney. The former Middlesex man and the England chairman of selectors were spotted deep in conversation on the historic vessel the Mirimar (built 1934) as it meandered up the Brisbane River on Wednesday morning on its daily trip to the Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary.

Time to get caught out

Australia, as you may be aware, is an awfully long way away from England. The time difference between Britain and Australia is about half a day: that’s why the cricket is on in the middle of the night in England. That’s the solar system for you, but the trouble is that the solar system makes things damned awkward for a writer.

View from the sofa

6.45am: Starting to flag badly now, having woken just under 24 hours ago and not managed a pre-Ashes nap. Play should be finishing in about 15 minutes but England have bowled so slowly that there are still 11 overs remaining. Only one bowler has stood out - that old hero Flintoff again - and possibly Pietersen has been the second best, as he got a lot of turn from the pitch that Giles couldn't find. Will I make it to the close? Will England? Need...bed...night-night...

Wheelie bin gets nod

This just in: Ashley Giles has, as we feared, received the nod over Monty Panesar. Good luck to him, I hope he takes a few wickets and makes lots of runs. But I wish England had had the cojones to go for Monty.

On your marks...

So, an hour and a half to go. Just enough time to plump up the cushions, fill the kettle, find the batteries for the remote control and think happy thoughts of 2005. And to introduce the Times team who will be guiding you:

In Australia: Christopher Martin-Jenkins, Simon Barnes and Geoffrey Dean will be reporting and blogging from the Gabba and elsewhere. Check out Geoff's close-of-play verdicts, CMJ's video analysis every lunchtime (our time) and Simon's exquisite flights of fancy via timesonline.co.uk/ashes and Line and Length. Plus Shane Warne's podcasts, Matthew Hoggard's video diary and Nigel Henderson's dispatches from among the Barmy Army.

In England: Me, bringing whimsy, ephemera, points of interest and trying to keep my eyelids open for seven hours a night. Let me know how you think the Ashes are going by clicking on the comments button beneath each post. You can also relive past Ashes glories (and a few dismal failures) with the Times Ashes archive here.

It's going to be a fun couple of months if only England can summon the spirit of the Oval 2005. All together now: And did those feet...

Point of order

Parliament has been back in session for a whole week and already 227 early day motions (the means by which little-known MPs get coverage in their local press) have been tabled on subjects ranging from "The Centenary of Scouting" to "Unlawful Shooting of Tibetans", stopping at such odd topics as "Grimethorpe Colliery Band", "Public Lavatory Provision" and "Dogs Given as Christmas Presents".

No mention of the Ashes. Not a single "This House believes that England should have chosen Read over Jones" from the member for Little Wallop, nor any "This House thinks Andrew Flintoff should bat if he wins the toss" from the MP for Much Rutting in the Marshes. Not even a paltry "This House wishes England good luck" with love and kisses from David Cameron.

I think England can feel rather let down by her politicians. No doubt they'll all be there for the photo call when Flintoff brings home the Ashes.

England's No 10

I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I've just read a story on the newswires with the headline: "Blair rules himself out as England's Ashes secret weapon". Drat, and there I was thinking that the Prime Minister was exactly the person to answer the troublesome lower-order conundrum. Never mind Panesar vs Giles, what we want is someone who really knows how to spin.

Blair held what his press monkey called "an improvised 10-minute net session with children" in Downing Street (ie, it was planned months ago to give him a photo opportunity on the eve of the Ashes), awkwardly grasped a blue plastic bat and played a few forward defensives to balls that were pinged down at him.

Tomorrow's news today

Taking full advantage of the time difference in Australia we can let you know now what their papers are reporting on the first morning of the first Test in Brisbane - and they seem to have every angle covered.

Cloud nine

Congratulations to Brian Lara who notched up his ninth Test double hundred this morning in Multan, pulling farther away from Wally Hammond's seven and a shade closer to Don Bradman's astonishing record of 12 in 52 matches. Lara has now scored double hundreds against five different opponents, matched by Rahul Dravid and Javed Miandad (Bradman only played four opponents).

Twenty years on

Another missive from Nigel Henderson, our man with the Barmy Army:

"The broadcasting networks went head to head on Tuesday night to mark the start of what is being described as 'the most eagerly awaited Ashes series in history' on a daily basis, but ABC, who will provide radio commentary on the five Test matches, outdid Channel 9, who will supply the television output. While Mark Nicholas was fronting the Channel 9 extravaganza in downtown Brisbane, which included, as a high spot, the performance by Sherbert, a 1970s pop group, of Howzat, their one hit, ABC showed a documentary that seemed designed to rouse the patriotic feelings of the home troops ahead of Thursday's first day.

Back where I belong - almost

How wonderful to be back in Australia: and how terribly English of me to feel that way. After the Sydney Olympic Games six years ago, an awful lot of English people came out to Australia on Olympic visas as helpers, volunteers and so forth, the Olympics being huge and requiring an awful lot of bodies. And when the visas were all up, there were a good few still missing: vanished into the maw of Australia. One thing puzzles me about this: how come there weren't more? How come anybody went back?

Jones' family to attend Gabba

When England played the Gabba Test in 1998, the Queensland third-choice wicketkeeper was none other than one Geraint Jones. Or rather 'Grant' Jones as he used to be known in those days. On Thursday, the Papua New Guinea-born cricketer, who grew up in Brisbane, will step onto his once "home" ground wearing the Three Lions of England.

Tait released while Bell hopeful

While Australia released Shaun Tait from their 13-man squad on Wednesday morning, England received some optimistic news after Ian Bell got through a net session. His left wrist still heavily bruised after he was struck on Tuesday by James Anderson, Bell is now "expected to be fit" for the first Test, according to Andrew Walpole, England's media liason manager. The fact a final decision will not be made until the morning of the match nevertheless suggests the England management still want to see a further improvment in Bell's condition.

Mission statement

Why set our sights so low as England retaining the Ashes after a drawn series? The ICC's number-crunchers have worked out that if England beat Australia by three clear Tests this winter, they will usurp Ricky Ponting's side as the world No 1 and grab hold of the prestigious ICC Mace, left.

Statistics show the test ahead for England. In the latest LG ICC Test rankings, there are six Australians among the top 20 batsmen (a list headed by Ponting) and five among the best 20 bowlers. England, by contrast, have three in each list: Pietersen (10), Strauss (13) and the absent Trescothick (19) in the batting list, and Flintoff (5), Hoggard (7) and Harmison (10) in the bowling.

Dr Goochie

Hot on the heels of Ian Botham's doctorate, Graham Gooch is to get an honorary PhD from Anglia Ruskin University during a ceremony at Chelmsford Cathedral today. The former England captain and Essex batting coach, is being honoured "for his long and dedicated contribution to county cricket in Essex, and for his illustrious international record as a successful Test Captain of England".

Hmmm. Not sure whether ten wins in 34 Tests as captain is all that illustrious or successful but he was certainly one of the best batsmen of the late 20th century and it was always a pleasure to watch him play for England or Essex so congratulations.

The fighting Irish

Grim news from Australia of Ian Bell's wrist injury (thanks a bunch, Jimmy) means that Ed Joyce, left, (pic Gareth Copley/PA)  might make his Test debut on Thursday. He would be the sixth Irish-born cricketer to play a Test for England. Let's hope some of that fabled Irish luck is with him. It certainly wasn't in June when he wrenched his ankle in a Twenty20 international.

The first Irish-born cricketer to play for England was Leland Horne, a Dubliner like Joyce, who was picked for his only Test, in Melbourne in 1879, on the back of two first-class matches and England's lack of a wicketkeeper. He scored 13 runs. Timothy O'Brien was barely more successful at the highest level: although he scored more than 11,000 first-class runs for Middlesex, he made only 59 in his eight innings for England in a Test career that spanned 12 years from 1884 to 1896.

Watson out, but Bell may play

On the same day that Shane Watson was ruled out of the first Test with a hamstring strain, Ian Bell's participation in the match was also in doubt. An X-ray on the Warwickshire batsman's right wrist revealed no fracture after he was struck in the nets by James Anderson, but the bruising is so deep that he will have to be re-assessed on Wednesday. The likelihood is that any decision on whether he plays will be left until the morning of the match.

Bell in hospital

Ian Bell is a major doubt for the first Test on Thursday after he was hit on the right wrist by James Anderson in the nets at the Gabba on Tuesday morning. The Warwickshire batsman was unable to face another ball, walked off grimacing in pain and had his wrist packed in ice. He was later driven to hospital in Brisbane for an X-ray.

It is a desperate blow for England, who have been cursed by injuries on past tours of Australia. Four years ago, their injury list was so lengthy that they used as many as 31 players for the Test and one-day series here. What is so galling for Andrew Flintoff's team is that Bell played so well in Adelaide last week, scoring a fine hundred against South Australia.

Good footwork

If you are already feeling depressed about the chances of English cricketers winning anything this winter, then consider this: Mark Ramprakash is now the runaway bookmakers' favourite to follow in Darren Gough's sequined footprints and win the BBC's Strictly Come Dancing. Ramps, the Surrey batsman, has seen off six "celebrities" and is now 5-4 favourite to triumph on December 23, ahead of Emma Bunton at 10-3, Matt Dawson 4-1 and others. Now you can feel really depressed.

Meanwhile in Multan...

I feel slightly guilty that with all the hoo-hah in Australia, we've been ignoring cricket elsewhere. Pakistan are playing the second Test of a series against West Indies, while India and South Africa are trying to fit in a one-day series between rain showers. I promise that over the next few months this blog will not be just about the Ashes, even if Monty Panesar takes a ten-for at Adelaide.

The Pakistan/Windies series is the more interesting, not least because it gives us a chance to see if Brian Lara's side are more than just an increasingly confident one-day side. After the first Test, which Pakistan won by nine wickets, it appeared not, but this Test is more balanced. At the close of the second day, having bowled Pakistan out for 357, West Indies are 151 for 0.

Watson still doubtful

Australian hopes that Shane Watson could bowl at around 60 per cent of full capacity on Monday proved far too optimistic, increasing the likelihood that he will not make the cut for Thursday's opening Test. The all-rounder, who left the field at the WACA in tears on Friday after tweaking a hamstring in mid-over in a state one-day match, was able to trot in off only a few paces and bowl very gentle medium pace when Australia practised at the Brisbane Grammar School in Northgate. Tellingly, he refused to give his chances of playing any sort of rating.

While Watson looked glum at the prospect of missing his first Ashes Test, some of the school's best players enjoyed some moments to cherish after being allowed to practise with the Australian squad. It included Michael Clarke, who had got up at 4am to catch an early morning flight to Brisbane, after receiving a summons to standby for Watson. If Clarke does play, Australia's long-laid plans to play five bowlers will be dashed, for his flat left-arm spin is only occasional.

Panesar's unlikely source of support

Followers of English sport will long remember, and indeed cherish, one particular headline in the Sydney tabloid, the Daily Telegraph. "Is that all you've got to offer?" the often one-eyed, jingoistic newspaper's headline screamed a fortnight or so before England won the last Rugby World Cup. Three years later, perhaps mindful not to make a similar mistake, an opinion piece in the same publication has directed effusive praise in the direction of the young spinner.

Describing Panesar as "one of the most exciting talents to honour our shores in many a year," Jeff Wells, in a piece headlined "Sikh not to sledge", makes what is effectively an honourable plea to Australian supporters to show some respect. "If anyone is going to make or break 24-year old Monty Panesar in this Ashes series, let it be the Australian team not the Australian crowd," Wells began. "In fact, I'm hoping that by the end of the series, one of the abiding memories will be that of hordes of little kids in green and gold queuing up to get the galvanizing left-arm spinner's aotograph."

Reverse psychology

Either Duncan Fletcher is the canniest so-and-so around or he is the cruellest. With less than a week to go before the first Test, the England head coach has undermined both his leading spinner and most of his batsmen. It appeared that by being selected as the sole spinner for England's final warm-up match, against South Australia, Monty Panesar had won the nod for the Brisbane Test, but as Fletcher made clear today, that might not be the case.

"We wanted Monty if Trescothick was there, because Trescothick added [batting] depth. Now, we might have to re-think it," Fletcher told BBC Sport.

Ignoring the obvious discrepancy that Marcus Trescothick left the tour on Tuesday, two days before Panesar was chosen for the warm-up match, what sort of message does that send to the England team? Fletcher is effectively saying that the rest of the batsmen are not as good as someone who averaged 27 last summer, scored 10 runs in two warm-up innings and who had a delicate mental health. Meanwhile, Panesar, who took 27 wickets last summer, may lose his place to a man who has bowled just 31 overs in the past year and who doesn't need to play in the last warm-up match.

Crazy, absolutely bonkers. My only hope is that this is all part of some subtle reverse psychology to bring the best out of his players. After all, Fletcher also poured scorn on Panesar after the Old Trafford Test last summer, and the spinner immediately proved him wrong at Headingley.

Equality street

It says something about how women's cricket has become more high-profile that I saw this headline on Cricinfo just now:

"Taylor and Edwards could be the pair for the future" - Courtney Walsh

and my immediate reaction was "why does the former West Indies bowler have an opinion on the England women's batting line-up"?

Apparently he wasn't talking about Claire and Charlotte but rather Jerome and Fidel, the West Indies bowlers. On reflection, that would make more sense.

Vroom for improvement

For some reason, Line and Length is jam-packed with stories about county cricket just as the biggest Test series of the past 18 months is about to get under way (see yesterday's offerings). Says something about my priorities I guess. Anyway, tonight's story is a heart-warming one about the lengths that the president of a county will go to save his starving flock.