Bad boys spoil it for everyone

Ronald Reagan once said that the most frightening sentence in the English language is "Trust me, I'm from the Government and I'm here to help." For cricket lovers, it might be "Trust me, I'm from the ICC/ECB and we're setting up a working party to look at ways to enhance spectators' enjoyment." It will inevitably lead to more reductions in spectators' liberties.

The latest ECB working party issued its report yesterday on how to respond to a smattering of incidents of bad behaviour last season. The press release was caked in references to protecting the "unique atmosphere and spirit of cricket", "preserving cricket's excellent reputation" etc. What it actually entails is a further reduction in the amount of trust that the governing body is prepared to give to its customers. A few oiks act like hooligans, therefore no one shall be allowed to do much more than sit and watch the game, preferably in silence.

While agreeing with the proposals to create alcohol-free family areas at grounds and to clamp down heavily on racism, I am not in favour of a ban on importing alcohol to Twenty20 matches, nor do I believe anything will be gained by stopping spectators from going on the outfield at the end of a match or, especially, from importing a wave of specially trained jack-booted yellow-jacketed stewards to county games. Most spectators are responsible grow-ups, treat us as such.

The experience at the Brit Oval has become throughly killjoy in recent years, with stewards standing right in front of the spectators for the whole match, not only blocking the view but attempting to end any attempts by some people at innocent fun. Who has ever had their cricket viewing ruined by the odd beach ball anyway?

As for going on the pitch, it was one of those things you most looked forward to as a child. The mid-session or close of play game on the outfield did much to bring the game to life and to raise hopes that one day you could actually be playing on the square. By all means protect the players and the playing area, but no harm is done by allowing people on the outfield. The knock-on effect of banning them, as I saw at one Twenty20 match last year, is that kids play with bat and ball on the concrete walkways instead, getting in people's way.

As for the alcohol ban: I have had miserable experiences at cricket matches when the booze has been flowing and some fans have got raucous. In particular, I remember one game at Chelmsford some 15 years ago when I went with my father and grandfather to watch Essex against the touring South Africans and we found ourselves sat between two rows of yobs who started shouting at each other. But how would banning the import of beer have stopped this when they could have bought (and probably did) as much as they wanted from the bars?

In the same way that I oppose much of this Government's anti-terror legislation because it will mean restrictions on the law-abiding while rum sorts will just (here's a novel idea) ignore the law, so I do not want cricket's administrators to ban me from bringing in a few bottles of my favourite beer, forcing me to drink the ground-bought Australian bilge that passes as lager, when those causing the trouble will just get beered up anyway.

Well this has been rather a long rant, so I leave you with a proposed solution instead of just a string of complaints. If the problem is that some spectators get too drunk, simply limit the amount of alcohol everyone can have. Allow people to bring in a bottle or two of beer or some wine, but then limit them to what they can buy at the bar, with tear-off chits on their match ticket. Perhaps allow them to buy one pint per session or per innings of a one-day game. That way, they can still drink, they can still choose to have their favourite drink if they want and they don't, or shouldn't, get drunk and abusive. Those who want more than one pint a session (plus their imported beer) are clearly not that interested in watching the cricket, so should be discouraged anyway. Yes, there may be some black-market trade in drink chits, but I doubt there will be much.

I doubt that the ECB or the counties would go for this plan, however, as it would mean a reduction in takings at the bars. The question is: are they serious about dealing with a problem or do they just want to be seen to be doing something?

Comments

[Angus]

Maybe it'll end up like baseball, where they tell you when to clap. Or that film, 'The Invasion', where anyone showing emotion (or falling asleep) is led away.

[Bobo148]

Another way, and more simple, would be to introduce a two drink maximum per person at any single purchase. That means that if there are three or more of you you need to go mob handed (maybe a bad choice of words) to the bar and therefore miss some of the cricket. It'll soon slow you down in the drinking race.