April's Pillock of the Month

Thought I'd forgotten? Today's the final day of the month and, as happened on the last day of January, February and March, it's time to highlight the absurdities and silliness of cricket with our regular Pillock of the Month poll. Following in the clown-shaped footsteps of Andrew Symonds, Jesse Ryder and Stephen Harmison, here are a half-dozen hapless loons who made headlines for the wrong reasons this month. Pick the biggest pillock.

Adidas For getting rid of the traditional cable-knit woollen sweater that has been worn by England cricketers since time immemorial. Yes, the new England kit looks rather good and, yes, the new ClimaCool sweater will probably make them more comfortable and, indeed, could make them better players. But surely standards have to be upheld?

The Canadian women's team Given a stonking 81 wides and 11 other extras in a one-day match against Trinidad and Tobago, Canada still couldn't win. Not really pillocks as such, but pretty hopeless.

Carl Hopkinson Not a household name to many of our readers but the Sussex batsman committed the cardinal sin for an opener of being run out twice in the same game, against Kent. The first was the silliest, being run out going for an overthrow off a ricochet, but it was perhaps rash to run a risky single in the second innings.

Mohammad Shafiq, a Mohammad Yousuf "lookalike" who tried to use his resemblance to the Pakistan batsman to gain access to the home dressing-room at Multan during a one-day international with Bangladesh. Just one flaw: the real MoYo was fielding at the time, a fact that hadn't escaped the security staff's attention.

Harbhajan Singh Asked to captain Mumbai Indians in place of the legendary Sachin Tendulkar, not only does he lead his team to three straight losses (not wholly his fault admittedly) but then he goes and slaps an opponent, Sreesanth, after the third. Banned for the rest of this year's IPL

The West Indies outfitters. Against Sri Lanka in a one-day international this month, Jerome Taylor came out to field with his name spelt "Tayrol" on his back. Furthermore, Devon Smith had clearly mislaid his shirt as he fielded for all 50 overs with a fair bit of masking tape obscuring the rather long name of Sewnarine Chattergoon, the replacement player who had lent him his.

Opinion Polls & Market Research

Comments

[Patrick Kidd]

Delorean, You are absolutely right. When I started on The Times in 2001 on the old diary column we used to hold a list of cliches that we should never use. Things like "rubber-face comedian Rowan Atkinson" or "diminutive funnyman Ronnie Corbett". I shall add "time immemorial" to the list

[Rusty]

In defence of tradition and sheep, I must vote for Adidas.

Bhargie is beyond being a pillock.

[DeloreanGray]

Could we have a challenge for May that Patrick is no longer able to use the words ''time immemorial''. It's becoming the journalistic worlds ''Right Areas''.