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July 08, 2009

Would you send your child to Hogwarts?

Harrypotter Well, with the premiere of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, this seems a topical question. It's also one which I'm guessing many Harry Potter readers will have asked themselves over the years. Your kids may love the idea of going (all that excitement, albeit with perhaps rather too much death and destruction), but I'm not convinced I'd send my children to Hogwarts (that's if they turned out to be talented muggles). Not only is it too dangerous, but what on earth would they learn there?!

In this essay by Steve Vander Ark, the consensus seems very much to be no, don't educate your children with Harry and co. After all, as he writes, the children really don't learn much, and the teachers do not treat their students well. He's right, isn't he? I don't recall much maths, foreign languages (although, of course they're no longer compulsory at secondary school in the real world either) or PHSE. Surely Hermione would love to read some English literature, whether a little bit of Forster (I think this would tickle her fancy) or something more challenging (the metaphysical poets?). Instead she's stuck with potion making, fighting off evil and learning magic. Hermione, Harry and friends also come up against so many truly terrible teachers (would Dolores Umbridge or Severus Snape be licensed to teach?)

English teacher and blogger extraordinaire Dana Huff has written a very detailed post on this very subject. In it she discusses the merits (or otherwise) of the main Hogwarts teachers, from Snape and McGonagall to Hagrid and Sybill Trelawney. Not many, other than Lupin (who makes the top five in my list of the most inspring teachers in films), and of course, Professor Dumbledore, are very inspiring. Mind you, Ms Huff is perhaps not as much of a fan of Dumbledore as others might be. She writes:
"We are never given an assessment of Dumbledore’s teaching skills, but based on his relationship with the students, he was probably fairly good. I do wonder at his skill in selecting some of his staff, but he seems, in all, to be a fairly good administrator. He is not always as supportive of his faculty as he could be, but often that’s because the faculty member in question is being unreasonable (Snape, most of the time)."

What do you think? Is Hogwarts an appealing educational establishment? Maybe I'd have a different view if I was currently at school, but for the moment at least, I'm glad that my daughter is learning to spell (beautifully and noisily are on her latest list) rather than learn spells....

Read School Gate:

The 25 best boarding school books

Dolores Umbridge makes number one - in the 15 worst teachers in the movies

The 15 most inspiring teachers in films

Which film adaptation of a book is your favourite?

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Comments

Hmm. Strikes me as dangerous more than anything. You'd never know whether your child was going to be eaten by giant spiders, for a start. I reckon that's probably the prime consideration, rather than the quality of the teaching:-)

Posted by: Kim | 8 Jul 2009 13:20:51

I have

Posted by: Jo | 8 Jul 2009 15:02:18

I have this discussion with my friend regularly. I remeber wishing at the age of 13 or so that I could go to Hogwarts but now I am glad I couldn't (it being made up :-)and wouldn't send any of my potential children.
We were discussing the absolutely terrible teaching and the fact that they don't learn any thing that useful to the rest of the world. Where is the maths, laguages, English lit, technology and anything creative. Oh and don't get me stated on why they can't use a biro or normal paper:-)
Still love the books though.

Posted by: Jo | 8 Jul 2009 15:07:48

The whole appeal of Hogwarts to children is precisely that they DON'T do ordinary lessons! It's the ultimate 'fun school'.

Posted by: Helena | 8 Jul 2009 15:28:10

No SATs thread???????

Posted by: TSM | 8 Jul 2009 16:39:07

Well, you're right, but let's see, if there was some sort of school like Hogwarts supposedly witches and magic creatures would exist and in that case it would me my pleasure to keep my children safe from those species sending them to learn some skills :)

Posted by: Dazhbog | 8 Jul 2009 17:21:52

I wouldn't send my kids to Hogwarts, no. I have less quarrel with the teaching staff than some, I imagine, but the safety of the students doesn't seem to be a high priority, the curriculum is extremely limited, and staff professional development is nil. Someone as smart and passionate as Severus Snape should not be as bad a teacher as he is in the books. If Dumbledore provided real leadership focused on improving teaching (rather than simply surviving until a miracle occurs), surely Snape would have improved (or been sacked).

Posted by: jsb16 | 8 Jul 2009 17:53:21

JSB, quite right! Inset days are long over-due for the whole staff.

No one has yet mentioned that Madame Hooch is the world's most useless ref - she lets Slytherin foul the whole time, and does nothing. Pathetic.

Posted by: Helena | 8 Jul 2009 18:46:23

I too am truely inspired by Prof. Lupin who deals magnificently with his personal trauma of being.... a werewolf. I am not certain however that the national curriculum is applicable in the magical land of wizards, perhaps they are more concerened with 'he who shall not be named' and the destruction of human kind than learning French.

Posted by: Derek | 8 Jul 2009 19:10:06

I wouldn't send my child to Hogwarts, I'd sign up as a mature student instead.

Posted by: starling | 8 Jul 2009 19:47:10

I would send my children to Hogwarts. I think that a lot of what they're learning there is pertinent to their careers - much more so than a lot of the stuff they have to waste time with in high schools and even colleges these days. My son recently had to take a course on Ancient African History. According to the school it's meant to "broaden their horizons and experience the non-western world".

Posted by: RDW | 8 Jul 2009 21:26:41

At the risk of inviting sneers, anyone can *complement* (not replace) their academic education with mystical education.....and you don't need to enrol in an institution to do it!

If this sounds appealing to you, get a copy of 'Initiation Into Hermetics' by Franz Bardon.

Posted by: Jason P | 9 Jul 2009 01:03:14

It is not overly dissimilar to the boarding schools I attended from age 7 until 18.

I am continually amazed by how little people who were educated in the state system actually learned at school compared to us.

For a start, we did not knock off at 3pm every day. Our day began at 0730 and we were fully occupied studying, eating or playing sport until 1930 every day from Monday to Friday. Wednesday afternoons were spent in sports.

On Saturdays we had lessons until 1230 - which amounted almost to doing 6 years in 5 years if compared to the hours in State schools.

We had 1 hour compulsory 'rest' after lunch, where we were forced (not that it was too onerous) to read a book in silence.

After supper, from 1830 until 1930, we had prep (homework) done in absolute silence (or else!).

We had perhaps 2 hours of TV a week, with the choice of program dictated by the duty staff member. (Bergerac and Shoestring were popular choices I recall!).

Saturday afternoons were either spent playing sport for the school in teams against other schools, or watching whoever was playing at home.

Saturday evenings were free time, as was all day on Sunday (after Chapel!).

This was more or less the routine I lived with for 11 years.

I am now 41 and still recall every teacher I had and most of what they taught me (at least to some extent) and I thank them all for the perseverence they showed.

Most of all, I thank my parents for understanding that education is the best gift you can give a child, and for sending me to schools that strived to understand every boy in their care.

I also thank my parents for being involved - making us bring text books home in the hols and giving us extra work to do, for turning up on wet Saturdays to watch sons getting muddy and wet on a rugger field, for bringing picnics to cricket matches and so on.

Hogwarts itself is obviously mythical and wasting academic time debating whether you would send a child there seems largely a futile endeavour to me.

Posted by: Bill | 9 Jul 2009 01:15:17

Elf and Safety would never allow it.......

Posted by: Ted | 9 Jul 2009 02:08:15

Oh dear, me. Not enough inspired teaching! Surely our children deserve better! When my 13-year-old complained her history teacher was not particularly interesting (or interested), she was informed that the vast majority of humanity are neither. We have to learn to get the most out of all sorts of people we are forced to deal with, including those we don't like much and who may not like us. She is still expected to try her best and get good marks. One should however, draw the line at teachers torturing or killing students.

Posted by: Angela | 9 Jul 2009 03:33:08

In a heartbeat I'd send our daughter! She would be a brilliant witch--much like Hermione.

Posted by: JM | 9 Jul 2009 04:55:11

Oh, come on Kim, where's your sense of adventure? After all, whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger, giant man-eating spiders included. Sounds like a brilliant way to get some backbone into a child. (harrumph, etc).

Posted by: LM | 9 Jul 2009 06:47:04

"Hogwarts itself is obviously mythical and wasting academic time debating whether you would send a child there seems largely a futile endeavour to me"....
REALLY? Oh no! Tell me Father Christmas is real though??

Posted by: Tracy | 9 Jul 2009 07:20:21

They don't learn much? As I recall they learn the exact things they are going to need to live their lives - a lot more practical than our education.

Posted by: Marc | 9 Jul 2009 07:50:28

JO - Love it!

Posted by: Ben | 9 Jul 2009 08:42:23


This is really about whether or not to send your children to private schools.

Mr Cameron, as leader of the Conservatives, should be all in favour of private enterprise and so he should support private schools.

As he can certainly afford to pay school fees he would, by sending his children to private school, release places for other children in his local state school.

This would be far more beneficial to the state education system than his hollow, hypocritical posturing.

Mr Major sent his son to Felstead; Mr Duncan Smith send his sons to Eton. Whatever their other failings they had a far sounder and more principled view of of education than the pathetic, rudderless Mr Cameron.

Posted by: Richard Tracey | 9 Jul 2009 08:51:17

Having done a BA in Classics at Exeter University, I was actually taught for a while by the man the chracter of Snape is based on! And I might add that he was one of the most wonderful teachers I've ever met, as a pupil or now as a teacher myself! Quite disappointed he never showed us any magic spells, though...!

Posted by: Victoria | 9 Jul 2009 09:37:25

I have just realised what has always seemed to be so familiar about Peter Mandelson! He is now revealed as 'The Dark Lord'!!! [I wonder just who his Dementors might be?]
It is obvious to me as a pensioner, that we 'muggles' fail to become aware of the incursions of these other, magical peoples at our deathl peril!

Posted by: S. Barraclough | 9 Jul 2009 09:39:26

Why is there nothing creative there? No art lessons, no music, nothing. But then, the job opportunities seem very limited - PR (liaising with Muggles) or going to work for the public service. Maybe they need to have lots of fun at school, as a compensation for the incredibly dreary bureaucratic future before them.

Posted by: Fenella | 9 Jul 2009 09:59:32

True Fenella - that is my problem with the school when the come out their oportunities are extremely limited! They can't join the muggle world if they want and get an interesting job there even. Most people seem to be shop keepers, look after bizarre animals, teach or work for the civil service. You can't even get on well at the bank as it is run by Goblins and the only jobs are the very dangerous ones - looking for gold.

Posted by: Jo | 9 Jul 2009 10:09:28

As I have an interest in growing herbs I would be very interested in learning a thing or two about herbology from Professor Prout.

Posted by: Paul | 9 Jul 2009 10:12:09

Well parents sent their children to NEVERLAND RANCH....!!!!!

Posted by: IAN PAYNE | 9 Jul 2009 11:26:46

well if you've been in a bog standard school lately you'll find that the children don't learn anything anyway. I would much rather have gone to hogwarts, and will send my kids if the letter arrives.

Posted by: tam | 9 Jul 2009 11:47:50

I would also like to point out that they have to do lots of essay writing, for example on the properties of wolfsbane.

Posted by: tam | 9 Jul 2009 11:49:43

No, but then I'm just a Muggle

Posted by: Gareth | 9 Jul 2009 12:00:21

Yes indeed, anything to get them out of the basement, and out of the house.

Posted by: Jack | 9 Jul 2009 15:38:59

Are you all judging your (wrong) opinions on the books or the films? lets start with teaching the arts such as music - there is a choir singing in i think the 4th film, so they must teach that at hogwarts!

snape being a bad teacher - he doesnt accept anyone on his NEWTS course that doesnt get an Outstanding grade - so actually he must be pretty damn good.

Health and Safety - we practically have to wrap our children in bubble wrap before they are considored safe in todays totally over the top safety bound schools, there is nothing wrong with getting into scuffles or contact sports (quidditch)

Career advancement - there are people coming out of university right now that only seem to be able to get a job at mcdonalds - i think i would much rather know that i would be coming out of school to work with dragons or even run my own shop.

Posted by: Timbo | 9 Jul 2009 16:18:38

Completely agree with Bill: Hogwarts and other private establishments do manage to cover much more content, and more "real" subjects. Then the people who went there become ministers and civil servants who design a state system that follows very different standards. If the state schools were modeled on the private ones there might be less of a social gulf, and then where would we be? At present about 10% benefit from a private education, but what percentage of senior civil servants, ministers, MPs etc had a private education - 70%? ..more? Of course these are statistics we never see....

Posted by: Patrick | 9 Jul 2009 16:45:31

R u guys serious? It is a fictional school! Find something else worthwhile to harp about!
FOOLS!

Posted by: cookie | 9 Jul 2009 16:45:36

Oh, but it's FUN, Cookie, and it sounds much more fun than the boarding school I went to. Quidditch even sounds more fun than lacrosse, which I loved.

On the topic of subjects that are or aren't taught, isn't arithmancy something to do with maths, or am I just inferring that from the name? There is obviously music there too, and Ancient Runes is probably not dissimilar to studying Latin or Greek. Potions is a bit like chemistry, there's history of magic, and I bet Muggle studies has a few of the subjects we do at school in it.

Languages might be useful though, or did they have some sort of automatic translation device in The Deathly Hallows - or perhaps that was the fake Deathly Hallows book I read! (It was actually pretty good, and I now have trouble remembering which storyline happened in which version of the book.)

All in all, yeah, why not? If the letter came, I'd send Son. Although as a Muggle parent, I'd probably ask a few more questions about the school than Hermione's parents seemed to.

Posted by: Mrs Baum | 9 Jul 2009 17:17:52

schools these days are so strict and uptight about every single thing. they dont allow children to follow their imagination.were stuck with rules and lessons that are being taught when some children may wish to do something completley different to geography or science.in these films yes there is the risk of danger but theres also adventure and magic and imagination which is what most children LOVE,hence why the films are so popular.its them fighting for whats right and good in this world-which does not happen enough in the society we live in today.

Posted by: vicki | 9 Jul 2009 18:02:40

is everyone completely dense!!! this is a whole entirely different world compared to ours!! they exist sepeartly and thus teach the subjects required to succeed in their world! Why would they learn about literature n technology which applies 2 our society!

Posted by: Cho Chang | 9 Jul 2009 18:03:25

It sounds like a brilliant place! Much better than the sterile, risk free environments children are exposed to these days. I went to a large public school, we had our own chartered train from paddington station. The whole adventure of going away to school is great fun. I just hope i can afford to send my children.

Posted by: Richard | 9 Jul 2009 21:33:41

Are you kidding?! Hogwarts would be the coolest place in the world. And they totally learn other subjects other then magic based... but no one would want to read about that in a book... it's bad enough that we have to take the subjects that are so boring, why would we then want to read about someone else doing it haha. And if theres magic why would it matter if you could do trigonometry?!

Posted by: Mitch | 9 Jul 2009 23:52:25

I'd send my child there. Imagine parents evening with Professor Snape...

Posted by: Maybe I'll Catch Fire | 10 Jul 2009 04:03:42

SHAZZZAM!
By Garth Rex

Somewhere close to Nowhere, on the other side of the Sun,
I sit and write in a frozen night while a comet bites my bun.
Don’t know how I got here, wherever the devil I am,
All I know is my son got mad and said to me: “Shazzzam!”

I can see the rings of Saturn, and the backside of the Moon,
A huge black hole is after my soul and it’s gonna get me soon.
Where worlds collide and galaxies slide at an astronomical pace,
I live in fear for I’m face to face with the monsters of time and space.

I thought that I was doing right when I sent him to that school,
Where witches conspire, demons perspire and warlocks foam and drool.
For after graduation there would be no botheration to work or to find a job,
A simple spell and he’d make a well… full of pounds or pennies or bob.

I hope that my son has second thoughts, ‘cause I miss The Lion and Crown.
Say hello to the lads and kiss all the lassies so fair in London Town.
I miss my beer, my fish and chips, my wife, my love, my honey!
The only hope for this old dope is that he’ll soon want his pocket money.

Posted by: GARTH REX | 10 Jul 2009 07:39:59

I went to a New England boarding school in the late 70s and let me tell you! -Hogwarts is not that far off the experience. Loved it!!! and those friends I made at 16 are still close today.

Posted by: Lillie | 10 Jul 2009 15:56:10

It's far more interesting to study under an intelligent, educated eccentric than it is to undergo the agonies of contemporary schooling. I'd send my kids there like a shot, given the chance

Posted by: Steve | 10 Jul 2009 16:33:39

I think it is OK. Besides, my child could learn how to fight against bad monster and train to be brave.

Posted by: Lois | 11 Jul 2009 03:44:17

I would not. I think Hogwart's is just an example of the worst kind of ethnic ghettoisation. For example due to some strange traditions which we are told must be upheld because they are over 1000 years old, they do not use computers (or at least fountain pens and regular paper, they could go outside the field that means electronics don't work on site to teach the children). This renders their graduates unemployable in mainstream society. I think pandering to this sort of parochialism is just another example of bleeding-heart liberal multiculturalists allowing minorities such as wizards too much 'respect' for those elements of their culture that are bigoted and segregationist, and will end up leaving us with a whole lot of disenfranchised young wizards on our hands. I am not the least bit surprised that this has led to extremist tendencies and even acts of terrorism perpetrated on Muggles by so-called Death Eaters. Of course it is important not to tar all wizards with the Death Eater brush, but I say if you want to live in these fair isles you have got to respect our culture and laws. Even moderate wizards constantly contravene air traffic regulations by overflying Central London without a permit. It is disgraceful and this wizarding madrassa is clearly at the centre of the problem.

Furthermore, I am in the process of suing Gringott's for racial discrimination as I recently applied for a job there and was told I wasn't 'goblinny enough'.

Posted by: Lizzie | 11 Jul 2009 05:49:04

Lizzie - way to go! What the hell do we think we're doing, segregating people who are 'differently abled' from us? Whatever happened to inclusion?? Wizards should not be educated differently from muggles, but integrated into the schoolroom, just like all 'differently abled' children.

Close Hogwarts Now!

(It's also been drawn to my attention that Hogwarts celebrates Christmas! Outrageous! Wizards are clearly not just discriminated against - they are themselves perpetrators of discrimination. Disgraceful.)

Posted by: Helena | 11 Jul 2009 13:17:38

Of course.I want them to talk proper

Posted by: headcheese | 12 Jul 2009 01:05:14

I always thought Hogwarts was selective, not private (pretty sure the Weasleys couldn't afford all those fees, anyway).

Posted by: Claire | 12 Jul 2009 01:43:44

LOL I feel the Potter books are not very well written but thats personal taste. The school itself appears to be elitist, treats a whole section of its society make up as second class ie muggles as inferiors. The teachers have little contol over the pupils who lack respect for the teaching staff and encourages children to break rules and lie and cheat but mind you it's better than the comprehensive run by Sauron down the road teaching toe rags how to nick cars, muggings and creating rings of power so there you go i suppose.

Posted by: Sean | 12 Jul 2009 03:01:10

Of couse i would send my son! Am i would aply myself for teacher if i could! Anything for a change like this!That's what everyone of us has been hoping since we first discoved that world, isn't it?

Posted by: katy | 12 Jul 2009 11:53:34

Where do I sign up? (I'm 30 going on 11 in this case!)

Posted by: Rachael | 12 Jul 2009 21:20:52

Alas
Even my children are too old.
My grandsons may qualify though & we would be so proud if they were accepted.
The youngest would love quidditch and magical creatures. The oldest would be excellent at magic potions and spells.
As for me; l would be happy to be ' the fat lady ' in the portrait. She only works part-time; & gets to live like royalty.

Posted by: carole cooper | 12 Jul 2009 21:38:46

I would not send my children for the same reason I did not let them see read the books. They are now in their 20's, very happy well adjusted, both within a year of college graduation and decided on their own not to see the movies: God says in Leviticus 20:6 & 7 if any person turns to mediums and wizards...I will set my face against that person...be holy for I am the Lord your God.

Posted by: Eric | 13 Jul 2009 06:49:47

I think my son would love it. He would miss our cats though and would probably smuggle the caretaker´s cat into bed. Magic sounds very useful compared to many things learned in schools. I hated English and considered it an incredibly useless subject even though I became a writer later

Posted by: Fiona Pitt-Kethley | 13 Jul 2009 07:30:57

Eric - The Harry Potter novels are the most moral children's stories I've ever read (bar Narnia)(and they are clearly on an equal moral rating to Narnia).

The fight against evil is portrayed exemplarily, and Dumbledore says some of the most ethically wise things I've ever heard in my life: eg

"It is not our abilities that make us what we are, but our choices"

"The time has come for us to choose between doing what is easy - and doing what is right."

Dumbledore understands completely that what defeats evil is very simple - love.

Children will learn more about good versus evil - and the price paid by good people to defeat evil, and the price paid by evil people (their souls!) to be evil - than from any other children's book in contemporary readership.

To me, a parent who denies their children the opportunty to read the books, or see the films, is not behaving ethically.

Posted by: Helena | 13 Jul 2009 08:32:36

But it does exist! Yes, it really does!

Where else did Gordon Brown and his pals learn to make a national bankruptcy disappear with a mere wave of the hand?

Magic's real and it's prime minister lives in 10 Downing Street! Just ask all those bankers that still get bonuses from bankrupt businesses. Just a pity he can't make the helicopter spell work for Afghanistan, though

Posted by: Keith | 13 Jul 2009 08:50:15

Eric, if your children take as literal a reading as you do of an anachronistic bronze age tome like Leviticus then they are by definition insane. Children can derive some highly positive allegorical inferences from Harry Potter, some of which are listed in other comments here. JK Rowling is a Christian who insinuated highly Christain values into a fantastical story designed to captivate a short attention span. She isn't a practitioner of Black Masses, you insipid religious wingnut.

Posted by: Greg | 13 Jul 2009 11:21:52

*jots "insipid religious wingnut" down to remember next time she wants to insult a daft Christian anti-Potterian*

Eric, you're not allowed to wear clothes made of two different cloths, you're not allowed to cut the hair in front of your ears, you're not allowed to sow different crops in the same field. You're allowed to sell your sister into slavery, though, so that's alright.

I do not take people with a "pick and choose" attitude towards the Bible seriously. Sorry. I also don't take people who judge the Potter books without reading them first seriously either. I've read the Bible and drew my own conclusions, now you read Potter and make up your own mind.

Posted by: starling | 13 Jul 2009 11:39:28

Eric - you've received a bit of a bashing, and from me included. But I put this to you - Christianity is a wonderful faith, but the Devil can work in subtle ways - including through the text of the bible itself. The Old Testament is what it says - the old covenant. As Starling says, the OT can tell us to do evil things (including sacricing our own children to God, as Abraham was prepared to do), but that doesn't give us an excuse to do so!

Posted by: Helena | 13 Jul 2009 12:19:33

Would I send my children to Hogwarts? Well that would depend on their special needs programme... Madame Pomfrey may be very good with growing a new skeleton or a Perpetual Nosebleed, but does she have the requisite skills to deal with complex and lifelong autistic spectrum disorders? What would the sorting hat do with a child with outstanding magical ability but, say, a violent case of Tourette's syndrome or oppositional defiance disorder? (is the sorting hat even accountable to the PTA I wonder) I must say I doubt that the teaching body is sufficiently sensitised to these issues. And can I just add that Hogwarts seems most unsuitable from the point of view of wheelchair access. Unless of course you are going to levitate everywhere...

Posted by: Bruce Kent | 13 Jul 2009 12:54:35

Would I? What kind of question is that?

"Proud parents of Hogwarts student"

Posted by: Morgana | 13 Jul 2009 13:11:18

How marvellous this all is. I think it's a better idea to send one's children to a school that actually exists.

Any adult who reads Harry Potter, without the excuse of reading it to their children, is beyond help. There are real books out there, written for adults!

Posted by: David | 13 Jul 2009 14:35:15

I rather like the Hogwarts school theme for this year:

"Hands that hold wands,
Cannot hold guns."

While it admittedly does interject a social agenda into a process some parents believe should be purely academic, it's rather appropriate in these troubled times, don't you think? Kudos to Headmistress McGonagle and Nu Labour!

Posted by: Ceridwin | 13 Jul 2009 15:14:05

Despite my enjoyment of the Harry Potter books, I've always been somewhat disturbed by the paucity of the curriculum. The kids get a solid basics education only up to the age of 11 (and who knows how solid the home-schooling education is, as compared with the one the Muggle-borns receive?), and after that, they're thrown into magical studies only.

Where are Magical Languages and Literature? Shouldn't the Hogwarts students be studying Latin and Greek and not just Ancient Runes (which is an elective anyway)? Surely there are some great Wizard novelists and poets; and how are these students writing long essays with so little instruction in English?

Astronomy, in my experience, requires much more mathematics than one would have studied by the age of 11, and presumably Arithmancy would, too. And wouldn't Potions require some basic real-world Chemistry along with the magical principles?

And I really can't figure out why there are no Wizard universities and why the quaint parchment and quill pens couldn't be replaced by magical computers. They could set up their own version of the Internet: call it WizardNet. And E-Mail is so much faster than owls that it might as well be magical.

Finally, the Wizards live among Muggles, like it or not, so Muggle history is of no little relevance. Wizards in the U.K. and on the Continent weren't affected by World War II in any way?

As a Muggle, in other words, I might well send my Wizard child to Hogwarts to prepare for his or her future life in the Wizard world, but you can bet that child would be receiving serious tutoring in other, non-magical subjects every summer!

Posted by: Eleonora27 | 13 Jul 2009 15:45:21

Exactly. How can little Johnny cast a spell if he can't spell in the first place? Appalling state of affairs.

Eleanor opines, "As a Muggle, in other words, I might well send my Wizard child to Hogwarts to prepare for his or her future life in the Wizard world, but you can bet that child would be receiving serious tutoring in other, non-magical subjects every summer!"

Posted by: Reg Harumphster | 13 Jul 2009 16:32:37

Wow some of you lot are really heavy.

Posted by: Simon | 13 Jul 2009 16:40:45

When they leave exactly how do they make a living if not teaching at the school, in the ministry of magic or the goblin bank?

Posted by: William garrett | 13 Jul 2009 17:07:02

Are you daft? Send my children to Hogwarts? The school that produced a whole legion of murderous racial-purist Death Eaters? There's the namby-pamby Progressives for you. No way!

But that Smeltings Academy sounds like a rum school, I must say. That's where Harry's cousin Dudley went; maroon tailcoat, orange knickerbockers, straw boater hat, and great knobbly sticks for bashing things. Sounds like great fun. Young Hogwarts miscreant Tom Riddle would have had all that "call me the Dark Lord" foolishness knocked out of him by the second year at Smeltings.

Yes, yes, I know you'll say Smeltings' a bourgeois private school, but its students come away far better prepared to deal with dictatorial Voldemarts and other harsh realities of life than they'd got mucking about with that lot of hippy wizard layabouts.

I'd take bets on the outcome of a quidditch match between Smeltings and Hogwarts.

Posted by: Mervyn | 13 Jul 2009 17:42:07

It seems that Hogwarts-themed summer camps for the Universalist-Unitarian Churches in the U.S. are the big pull this summer, especially in the Bible Belt where the Unitarians enjoy every chance they can to irritate the fundamentalists

Posted by: David Chorley | 13 Jul 2009 20:22:57

WHilst i did enjoy reading the Harry Potter books and i will be watching the films, i cannot belive firstly that a journalist is getting paid to write this irrelevant drivel and secondly that so many people are posting (apparently seriously) about the merits of Hogwarts. Grow up

Posted by: Duncan | 13 Jul 2009 20:52:59

Duncan writes, "...secondly, that so many people are posting (apparently seriously) about the merits of Hogwarts."

Duncan, no one's really taking the question seriously. It's a ridiculous question and everyone's having fun with it, everyone except you. So lighten up on the pomposity, "Ernie McMillan," or we'll have the Sorting Hat place you in Slytheran House with the rest of the grumpyjacks.

Posted by: Germaine de Issue | 13 Jul 2009 21:11:29

Now that Voldemort's dead and gone, absolutely. Up until then I'd have kept the kids far away for fear of them being the latest cannon fodder for whatever nefarious attempt to invade the school or kill Harry was going on this year. The place just wasn't safe *lol*

As for not learning English or Maths - well clearly they're not going to learn Muggle world subjects, they're going to learn subjects relevant to the Wizarding World they live in. Besides, they can always do some further Muggle education in later years!

Posted by: Hol | 14 Jul 2009 12:55:29

Ok... They dont use pens and proper paper and dont have computers ect. because jk rowling set the story before all of this. why do you think they have ye'old wireless radio in the film.

Also they would have been taught the basic maths, english ect. before the age of 11. and from about year 6 onwards, in todays society, kids do not learn + and - ect. but equations and n=67t. or whatever. but harry and friends would not have needed that because the jobs they would go on to do mainly would just have consisted of spells ect. i would send my kids there.

Oooh seeing the film tonight!! xx

Posted by: Sofia. | 15 Jul 2009 11:30:15

In JK Rowling's Potter books, wizards and witches can withdraw their memories from their brains (they look like silvery wisps or strands) and, by placing them in a Pensieve, allow others to view and even experience the past they have known.

This ability, if added to the general curriculum, would offer many extraordinary educational possibilities at Hogwarts.

Also, in the Potter books, bad memories can be placed into vials and stored away out of mind.

Gordon Brown should be researching memory pensieves and vial storage. Perhaps he already is.

Posted by: Philophrates | 15 Jul 2009 14:33:29

"Ok... They dont use pens and proper paper and dont have computers ect. because jk rowling set the story before all of this. why do you think they have ye'old wireless radio in the film."

I am about to show myself up as a real Potter geek...

Muggle electronic gadgets like computers wouldn't work in Hogwarts. All the magic in the air affects the electrics! And also, the Potter story happens during the 90s, so it's not ye olde days!

Posted by: Hol | 16 Jul 2009 12:52:16

Well she is a little witch

Posted by: Bartimus | 16 Jul 2009 15:35:38

Way to spoil the fantasy and wonderment of Hogwarts! Moaning on about the curriculum... ugh!

I'd send my kids if they wanted to go, and if they didn't, I'd go in their place :D

Posted by: Louise | 16 Jul 2009 15:36:37

@William Garrett: There's also mediwzardry, writing, singing, law, zoology (see Newt Scamander), manufacturing of goods, shopkeeping, sport, journalism, secretarial work, managerial work, research (potions don't invent themselves) connected with alchemy and more.
@Germaine de Issue: But I LIKE Slytherin! And I'm not a grumpyjack, just a cunning so-and-so with a penchant for swooping around the dungeons and a great appreciation for green and silver. Please don't send the frivolity-phobes my way!

Posted by: BECKY | 17 Jul 2009 10:10:35

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