Why we're better off without Euro 2008 anyway

Euro 2008? Mickey Mouse competition. Call it sour grapes but do we really want to win a trophy that is sitting in the headquarters of the Greek FA in Athens? Nobody in the world thinks that Greece are the best team in Europe, so why should our players spend next summer sweating it out in Austria and Switzerland, trying to win a tournament that is a pale shadow of the one that really matters – the World Cup. Fingers crossed, an English team will lift the European Cup in Moscow in May - with a little help from some foreign players - and then John Terry and Co can put their feet up for a few months and recharge their batteries before the best league in the world kicks off again next August.

Bad losers? Not us. Great teams have been missing the boat for years. Holland did not qualify for four World Cup finals between 1958 and 1970 but that did not stop the masters of total football finishing runners-up in West Germany in 1974 and in Argentina in 1978. The Orange army was not at the European Championship in France in 1984 either, but that did not stop Ruud Gullit, Frank Rijkaard and Marco van Basten lifting the trophy four years later in Germany.

There is light at the end of the tunnel. Our time will come. In the meantime we have to take it easy like the Dutch. Relax. Football is only a game. Look on the bright side, next summer there will be no WAGs, no new England shirt, no flags for sale at petrol stations, no official song and no missed penalties.

Instead we can look forward to a summer of peace, love and Big Brother 9. OK, the prospect of watching ten idiots becoming famous for doing nothing may not be appealing but it has to be better than watching eleven idiots letting the country down again. Thanks, but no thanks. Russia and Croatia are welcome to Euro 2008. We have got far more important things to do like mow the lawn or worry about how muddy Glastonbury is going to be.

Next summer we will paint our sheds, tidy up our garages, spend more time with our families and not worry about Michael Owen’s hernia or Stevie G’s big toe or Wazza’s metatarsal or Steve McClaren’s teeth. There is more to life than football but not for everyone, so prepare for the worst. Arsenal fans are going to start supporting Spain because cheeky Cesc plays for them, Liverpool fans are going to support Spain because half their team plays for them, Manchester United fans are going to parade around Surrey in Portugal shirts with Ronaldo on the back and Derby County fans are going to go back to their constituencies to prepare for the Coca-Cola Championship.

Life is not fair but do you really want to invest emotional energy in a tournament that has been won by a team who did not qualify for the finals - Denmark in 1992 – and a country that does not exist any more – Czechoslavakia in 1976?

We invented the beautiful game, reality television, steak and kidney pies and the world wide web. We are not going to let Scott Carson ruin 2008. Book that trip of a lifetime, join the gym, read War and Peace, go to Wimbledon, The Open or Lords, and when you get a chance, crack open a beer, switch on the TV, put your feet up and watch the best players in Europe strutting their stuff in Austria and Switzerland. And try not to think about Steve bloody McClaren.   

Comments

[Haydn Potter]

So far,the only man Ihave heard make the right noises to qualify for English manager is JAMIE Redknapp.The reason we are rubbish is that we play simple kick and rush football.Jamie has at least said those magic words, passing and movement. I used FIND A SPACE AND CALL FOR THE BALL. The combination of the two comments sums up the play of most of the top teams and we must change our style if we are to compete. Most of the so called 'minor' nations can now do it slowly - when they learn to do it at speed, that will be another layer above us and we really will be left with watching our league teams because the nationals will be so far behind it will be embarrassing.I am so cheesed off with the way we play nowadays, I don't really care that we lost now ! That is so sad because I am confined to home at present and the thought of watching a major tournament without England is unbelievable.