Ahead of the Game: United Want Minute's Silence

The news in 60 seconds

UNITED WANT MINUTE’S SILENCE
Manchester United will press on with plans to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the Munich air crash with a minute’s silence before their match against Manchester City on February 10, despite fears it could be ruined by a couple of idiots. “We do not feel that applause is appropriate given that 23 people died,” Phil Townsend, the club’s communications director, said.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/manchester_united/article3231710.ece

RONALDO SHOULD LEAVE – HIS MUM
Let’s hope Cristiano Ronaldo pays as much attention to his mum as AOTG does when his parents say he should get a proper job with a salary and everything. The Manchester United forward’s madre - is that Spanish or Portuguese? - says she doesn’t like English clubs and wants him to play for Real Madrid.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/manchester_united/article3231858.ece

HARGREAVES: IT’S A THREE-HORSE RACE
Fans on Merseyside will be in uproar after Owen Hargreaves declared the title a three-horse race between Manchester United, Arsenal and Chelsea. “I can’t see beyond the current top three as title winners and hopefully in May we’ll still be on top and looking down on everyone else,” he said. We expect to be deluged with e-mails from Everton fans, rightfully upset that their team’s chances have been dismissed.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article3231609.ece

LAMPARD THIGH AND DRY
Thin-Skinned Frank has suffered a setback in his recovery from a thigh injury and will miss the second leg of the Carling Cup semi-final against Everton tomorrow. “He has torn his thigh muscle for a second time and I think it could be between days or two weeks from now,” Avram Grant said.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/chelsea/article3232469.ece

O’NEILL PRAISE FOR MELLBERG
Martin O’Neill continues to treat his players like human-beings. The Aston Villa manager says he has no problems with Olof Mellberg signing a pre-contract agreement with Juventus and has thanked him for his efforts. “Olof’s commitment has been excellent and, even if he decides to go in the summer or signs a pre-contract, I would have no qualms about continuing to play him,” O’Neill said.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/aston_villa/article3232425.ece

ALMUNIA REPEATS ENGLAND HOPE
Manuel Almunia has admitted that he is more Spanish than tortilla, bull fighting and most of the Spanish team - but claims he is closing in on an England call-up. “I haven’t been called to play for Spain and I’m getting a lot of support here so it’s something to consider,” the Arsenal No 1 said (as AOTG weighed the final straw between its fretting fingertips).
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/arsenal/article3231575.ece

GERRARD BLAMES OWNERS
As surely as someone who says “I’m not being rude…” will follow it with a statement so vulgar that Jim Davidson would blush, any footballer who says “I have to be careful what I say…” will then shoot their mouth off like a Big Brother contestant. Steven Gerrard has blamed the club’s off-field crisis for the team’s 2-2 draw with Aston Villa. But he has to be careful what he says.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/liverpool/article3228582.ece

FINNAN’S IRELAND RETIREMENT
Steve Finnan, the Liverpool and Ireland right back, has announced his retirement from the international game. “There will be a new manager coming in soon who will have his own ideas for the future with younger players having the chance to stake their claim to be in his plans,” he said.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/liverpool/article3232166.ece

SAMARAS MISSES OUT. AGAIN
Another gilt-edged chance has gone begging for Georgios Samaras. Alex McLeish, the Birmingham City manager, has given up on a bid for the Manchester City forward after sealing the signature of James McFadden. One non-scoring forward is apparently enough, so he wants to concentrate on other areas of the team.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/birmingham/article3232290.ece

BILIC FOR FULHAM?
No sooner has Roy Hodgson given an interview to TheGame Podcast about his new job than rumours are circulating that the Fulham manager could be on his way. Slaven Bilic was spotted one seat away from Mohamed Al Fayed at Craven Cottage on Saturday. Is the Croatia coach about to become the club’s fourth manager in a year?   
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/fulham/article3228038.ece

PREVIEWS - KING IS BACK
Ledley King is poised to return for this evening’s Carling Cup semi-final defeat by Arsenal (sorry, we’re just so used to reporting on it that we’ve started predicting it…) and Jimmy Bullard could start for Fulham in the FA Cup replay away to Bristol Rovers. All the team news before tonight’s action.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/article3224140.ece

If you've got another couple of minutes

THE BUCK STOPS OVER THERE
AOTG would like to apologise for failing to press send on the e-mail yesterday until some time after the daily bulletin was meant to arrive in your inbox. We had intended to perform our job professionally for once, but news that [quick check of Times front page] £77 billion had been knocked off Britain’s stock market in its biggest one-day percentage loss since 9/11 affected – and we’ve got to be careful what we write - our ability to do our job. Ever since news of the collapse of the subprime property market hit the newsstands, we’ve barely been able to concentrate on football. And that’s without mentioning Northern Rock, which sent us spinning like Titus Bramble on a mudbath. 
OK, we’re joking. As you’re all no doubt aware by now, we’re just incompetent. But even during a bumper season for excuses - what with Stephen Ireland knocking off his grannies to get out of an Ireland match, Chris Coleman awash with guilt after his washing machine flooded and Steve McClaren claiming he needed that umbrella to keep the rain off his notes and not his thinning thatch –this is surely one too many. Are the off-field antics to blame for Liverpool’s recent performances or should the manager and - dare we say it – the players carry the can?
E-mail: sport@timesonline.co.uk

ANOTHER POOR EXCUSE…
It’s a good day for passing the buck. As if Stevie Me’s Teflon efforts weren’t dodgy enough, Calamity Jens has been at it as well. The out-of-favour Arsenal keeper has shown that it’s not just his gloves that are slippery by claiming that the only reason he turned down a move to Borussia Dortmund was because he couldn’t be sure his family would be safe in the leafy-yet-war-torn suburbs of North London. Nothing to do with seeing out his lucrative contract, of course.
“In London the crime rate is quite high,” Lehmann said, no doubt shocked by the harrowing words of Jacqui Smith, the Home Secretary who said she was scared to walk the streets of London. “Three years ago someone broke into our house. If you leave a woman and three children alone, that’s something people take notice of. I did not want to leave my wife and kids at home alone. London is far from being safe. Security reasons played a role in my decision to stay.”
Expect Arsenal to organise a trip to the local kebab shop for the Germany stropper any day now. We’d suggest that, like the Home Sec, he is also accompanied by a minder.

ROY HODGSON EXCLUSIVE - THEGAME PODCAST
Is Woy Hodgson weally Donald Rumsfeld in disguise? Here’s the Fulham coach talking about the known unknowns of being a skilled communicator on this week’s show: “There are a lot of people who speak the same language but still don’t communicate well. Being able to speak the language is a great advantage but being able to communicate is a great advantage as well and some great communicators might do a better job even though their language skills aren’t as good as someone whose language skills are really quite poor.”
We’d suggest (rather harshly after he agreed to talk to Gabriele Marcotti and Guillem Balague, who are much nicer than us anyway) that you listen to the interview and decide for yourself which category he falls into. Hodgson also discusses his new club’s relegation battle, why he feels like a continental coach and the challenge of signing players who measure up to his high standards.
Marcotti and Balague are also joined by Mark Chapman and Matt Dickinson as they discuss everything from Newcastle United to Zlatan Ibrahimovic. 
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/audio_video/podcasts/thegame/article3200363.ece

>>>>>THE TABLOID HEARTWARMER<<<<<
Ronaldo Merc for his mum – The Sun
What you need to know: 1) Something to warm the cockles of your heart (although we’re not sure what a bivalve mollusc is doing on your ticker, still less why it needs warming). 2) Footie megastar Cristiano Ronaldo has bought a £25,000 Mercedes for his cancer-stricken mum. 3) The Manchester United winker bought the flash motor as a present for her 53rd birthday after she passed her driving test last October. He’s spared no expense on the vehicle, which comes with all the trimmings. 4)  He’ll be wishing he hadn’t bothered after she repaid him with those embarrassing quotes about Real Madrid.

A quickie before you go, sir?

FERGUSON’S JOY
Sir Alex punches the air with joy after Manchester United beat Reading. If he could actually make a fist – rather than that child-like habit of sticking his thumb out like he’s ready to suck it – it would have been so much more intimidating. Decide for yourself if it’s really offensive. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlbQ_I40vok

FAST STARTER
Even Derby County don’t defend like this. Valladolid striker Joseba Llorente scores the fastest goal in La Liga history when he puts the ball in the net after only seven seconds against Espanyol. So fast that the defenders are still in the dressing-room doing their laces up. Probably.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTjBm6gEzBg

6
Number of times that Liverpool have been rescued by late goals this season. It’s a bit subjective, but we’ve made 80 minutes the cut-off point for “late”, with Steven Gerrard scoring the winner against Villa on the first day of the season (87min), Fernando Torres salvaging a point against Chelsea (90), Dirk Kuyt scoring the winner against Everton (90), Torres and Gerrard (81 and 85) scoring against Fulham, Gerrard grabbing the winner against Derby (90) and Crouch popping up last night (88).

In TheGame

Watch Peter Crouch comes to the rescue as Liverpool claim a draw against Aston Villa last night. Plus free Premier League highlights from all the weekend’s matches.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/article2236741.ece
In his African Cup of Nations blog, Kaveh Solhekol celebrates Ivory Coast’s winner against Nigeria – if for no other reason than it stopped Mark Bright talking virtually non-stop about the long grass.
http://timesonline.typepad.com/thegame/2008/01/mixed-news-for.html
Martin Samuel, our Chief Football Correspondent, asks whether there should be a minute’s silence before England’s next match in honour of those who died in the Munich air crash. Join the debate.
http://timesonline.typepad.com/thegame/2008/01/the-debate-shou.html
In Fanzine Fanzone, Richard Allen, our Fulham man, takes a leaf out of a history book to explain why Fulham can avoid relegation. After all, the Cottagers came good in 1966, despite a similarly season of upheaval. We’d call it clutching at straws.
http://timesonline.typepad.com/fanzine_fanzone/2008/01/it-coulda-been.html

>>>>>THE RIVALS<<<<<
* Yanks for nothing: Gerro rage at Kop owners – The Sun
* Meltdown: Gerrard’s swipe at Liverpool unrest – Daily Mail
* It’s over … Gerrard: rows end title hopes – Daily Express
* Late Crouch finds a silver lining – The Guardian
* Crouch rescues Liverpool as fans direct anger at owners – The Independent
* Liverpool’s Black Monday – The Daily Telegraph
* Toon boss targets Becks: Ashley’s making moves to lure Goldenballs to join King Kev’s Newcastle fairytale – Daily Mirror

Joe Bloggs’ Soapbox

Poor Titus. He can never win. He cocks up, he's all over the newspapers again. In fact, apart from his mistake he had a very good game. Solid defensively apart from that time, made a few great tackles and (I think) was pressuring when the goal went in. He may not be big 4 quality, but he's certainly one of the best for Wigan at the moment. If only he could stop making those mistakes.
Ben has probably managed to sum up Titus Shambles in those final eight words starting If only… 

The United players had better not be spreading out their towels [yesterday’s AOTG]. It's almost kick-off time …
AOTG is caught trotting out lazy clichés without thinking … whatever next? Manchester United playing a friendly in the middle of the season – just for the cash? Our thanks to the anonymous reader who pointed out our (latest) blunder…

I know it concerns the wrong kind of football - in every possible way - but did you see the Sky Sports bulletin between 10 and 11 yesterday morning? There was an item about the New York Giants beating the Green Bay Packers (including a “special” about a Scot who kicked the winning field goal) and then they moved to a crowd shot of “The Bikini Girls”.  (At this point my attention was most definitely arrested.)  Like the Toon Army that goes bare-chested whatever the weather, these girls - with a huge and entirely unnecessary banner advertising their presence - wear skimpy, bright yellow and extremely well-filled bikini tops above their jeans, even in that game’s - 4C.  As the camera dragged itself back to the on-field action, the presenter quite distinctly referred to 'the Peckers'.  His co-presenter audibly disgraced himself. Happy days!
Phil Williams manages a first … lowering the tone of AOTG. Maybe.

Send your mail to: sport@timesonline.co.uk

Tomorrow’s news today

- Stock market crash puts pressure on Liverpool’s American owners
- Martin Samuel on his team of the season. One clue, they’re from Merseyside.

And expect…

Lehmann to be pictured with Jaqui Smith, chewing on a doner with extra chilli sauce outside a kebab house on Holloway Road.

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