Martin Samuel responds to your comments on which players are overrated

Every football fan has blind spots. The great player who always seemed overrated. The legend you thought was a myth. Using these criteria Martin Samuel questioned the qualities of Zlatan Ibrahimovic, but he wanted to know who you thought was overrated. Here, he responds to your replies:

As an Ipswich Town fan, I  think of the following three gems: Titus Bramble, Darren Bent and Finidi George. The most underrated player of the last 20 years? Stand up Matthew Le Tissier. Richard.

MS: Right, some ground rules from the start. The phrase overrated implies the player was highly regarded in the first place which, I think, pretty much puts Titus Bramble out, even if one of the most respected football writers in the country did tip him as part of an England team of the future early in his career. Also, we are dealing with posts in the hundreds here. We haven’t the time to go off on tangents about underrated players, too. Many of us have jobs.

Aaron Lennon. He's a winger who can't cross a ball, doesn't score goals and rarely beats a player. I realise he's only young but at this stage he's treading water while stronger players, who actually have a game other than running very fast to the by-line and turning the ball over, overtake him quickly. Jonathan Norman.

MS: He got back in under Juande Ramos at Tottenham Hotspur, but that didn’t last long either, did it? All of the controversy over the treatment of David Beckham at international level would have been moot had Lennon stayed fit and stepped up to the plate, as Steve McClaren expected.

I find it incredible how the English press can slam Zlatan Ibrahimovic yet praise Cristiano Ronaldo. Ibrahimovic is consistently brilliant in Serie A but fails to shine in the big European games. The same can be said of Ronaldo. He tears apart most Premier League sides yet fails to show up against the top four or any of Europe's elite.

Neither are big game players, yet the English only highlight this characteristic in Ibrahimovic. Conor.

MS: Actually, there have been plenty of questions asked about Ronaldo on the biggest stage, particularly after Manchester United’s defeat in Milan last season. But Ronaldo is 23 (Ibrahimovic is 26), so there is time for him to grow to dominate these matches. Also, Ronaldo was among the players of the tournament at the 2004 European Championships and again at the 2006 World Cup. I do concede, however, the parochial nature of my observations on Ibrahimovic. I do not watch him every week in Serie A, but there does seem to be a pattern to his Champions League performances.    

Wayne Rooney, hands down, and I'm a Manchester United supporter. He does practically nothing at international level, and until he scores 20 in the Premiership like Fernando Torres, I wish people would quit purring about him. He needs to be less of a footballer and more of a predator. Chip Barbre.

MS: That he needs to work on his finishing is something all his managers, including Fabio Capello, have acknowledged. But doing nothing at international level, Chip? Did you see the 2004 European Championships? Over to Tom, who is red, apparently.

Given the frequency with which Rooney's name has cropped up I feel obliged to defend him. Measuring his ability by how many goals he scores is to miss the point.

The beauty of Rooney’s game is its simplicity. He reminds me of a young Paul Scholes because whenever he gets the ball he makes the right decision nine times out of ten. He doesn't overcomplicate things, if the best pass on is ten yards square that is what he does. Whether playing on his own as a target man, or in the hole, he is instrumental to United. He is an out and out team player who makes United tick, evidenced by the fact that they have yet to lose a league game in which he has played. Tomred.

MS: Now you’ve gone and done it, Tom, bringing up Paul Scholes.

Paul Scholes doesn't play and when he does play he chokes in big games; he can't run and is even lazier than Andrea Pirlo; he can’t tackle and that makes him a liability. Twice a season he'll hit some blistering volley and for that he's hailed as a football genius. Nonsense. RJA.

Scholes? Are you mental? Arguably the best attacking midfield player of the last 20 years. At clubs like Juventus, team talks would focus on stopping him as the way to stop United, and this was in the era of David Beckham, Ryan Giggs and Roy Keane. Several England managers have tried to persuade him to come back. He may now be past his best but overrated he is not. Ian.

MS: I’m not Judge Bennett, but I’m giving this one to Ian. I’ll concede RJA’s point about the tackling. Coming up: Pele was rubbish, says some nutter.

Pele. A fantastic international career, winning three World Cups (though after being injured early in the tournament, he contributed as little to Brazil’s 1962 triumph as Jimmy Greaves did to England’s 1966 victory) but what about his club career? Yes he played for Santos and scored an incredible number of goals, but neither then nor now is the Brazilian league home to the best defenders in the world. He was a Brazilian legend playing in a cosseted environment, unlike Diego Maradona who tested and proved himself in the Spanish and Italian leagues, home of great defenders, man marking and brutal tackles. Pele didn’t do that and, as such, only had half a career. He is the Matt Le Tissier of Brazil. Clarence Darrow.

What are you talking about? The Brazilian league was never the best? Pele was overrated? Brazilian players can be found in almost every championship in the world because they are the most technically gifted. Pele played against the best defenders at international level and still made them look ordinary. He could dribble at pace and was an all-round athlete. His scoring records at club and national level were astounding. Dan Donaghy.

MS: Plus, as Brazil won three World Cups during Pele’s time – and were kicked out of another one – I am guessing their defenders were not such mugs after all. There used to be a cross-eyed lion on a television show called Daktari that was named Clarence. Maybe they are related. The Brazilian Matt Le Tissier, now I’ve heard everything.

Andriy Shevchenko. Absolute rubbish. The biggest waste of money in football history, and probably the source of most of Chelsea's problems in the last couple of years. Simmojo.

MS: Did a bit at AC Milan though, mind you.

English players are hugely overrated if you consider their performances for England and underrated if you look at their club games. How can Steven Gerrard and Frank Lampard drive two magnificent club sides at home and in Europe and disappear without a trace at a World Cup or European Championship? Pedro Goncalves.

MS: I think some Italian chap has been asking the same question.

The most overrated accolade would go to Michael Owen and Ryan Giggs. Resting on glorious past achievements does not give you the divine right to be on the team sheet. Alex.

MS: Giggs: 18 consecutive seasons on the wing for Manchester United in the most physically competitive league in the world. Overrated, apparently. Anyone else feel the need for a shot of the hard stuff?

Barry Ferguson, of Rangers and Scotland. I always hear the commentators saying he is dictating the play and, true, he scores a few good goals, has a decent range of passing and tries hard, but who can't stand in the middle of the park in the SPL, wave his arms about and spray passes akin to Andrea Pirlo? In a team that plays 4-5-1 he is given a license to get forward which he does to reasonable effect, but to think that people are calling Steven Gerrard - one of the finest box to box midfielders of the last 10 years – ahead of him is nonsense. Graham.

MS: Ferguson did reasonably well at Blackburn Rovers but was certainly nothing exceptional, so does this say more about the standard of the league in Scotland?

Ashley Cole. He is supposedly a great defender, particularly going forward, but cannot cross a ball for toffee; concedes possession as he struggles to complete even simple passes, is not great at defending and concedes lots of free kicks. I hope Capello soon wises up and brings his England career to an end. Andy, Cambridge.

MS: And plays who, exactly? Wayne Bridge? Did you see the Croatia game?

This is a stereotypical English opinion - devour the Premiership week in, week out, catch the odd highlight of a La Liga or Serie A match, see a few internationals and Champions League games (when an English side is involved, of course) and then proclaim the Premier League to contain the greatest players in the world. It is saddening. Ian Thomson.

MS: And where exactly did I say the Premier League had the best players in the world? That debate piece was only 240 words long. How short is your attention span?

You don't watch a lot of Serie A, do you Martin? Alexander.

MS: Not a huge amount, Alexander, I think that is overrated, too.

Eric Cantona. He only ever rose to the small occasions. Whenever Man United played in Europe he hid. Joshua.

MS: I think he rose to plenty of big occasions in England, Joshua, but I will agree that in Europe he was consistently disappointing. 

This article, and a lot of comments, seem to be confusing a player not stepping up in the major games and the issue of a big-name myth. Thierry Henry is no myth, but he bottled it in countless big games. Kiran.

MS: And therefore some (not me) would argue his legendary status is a myth, Kiran. That is the point. The great players are judged in the great games, when the pressure is on and the stakes are highest.

Patrick Vieira for me. I could never see what the fuss was all about. He hardly ever scored and passed the ball back or sideways most of the time. He wasn't a bad player but everyone raved about him and I just couldn't see it. Tim H.

MS: Certainly, Arsene Wenger knew when to sell. He must get sick of being right, that bloke.

Typical English. You can tell you are basing these comments solely on the few Champions League games you've seen Ibrahimovic play. I live in Italy and can tell you that more often than not, Ibrahimovic performs as well as anyone. I have a friend out here who says the same about Cristiano Ronaldo, because he doesn't perform for Manchester United in the Champions League. Nick Roberts.

MS: So is he typical Italian, then, Nick? This inverted snobbery that paints the English as philistines and all continental observers as sophisticates is pathetic. The last time I did the Times podcast with my colleague Gabrielle Marcotti, he told me that Rolando Bianchi had a better scoring record than Michael Owen this season. Without the facts to hand I let it go on air, but went away and checked it. He was wrong. Your passport does not mean you know more.

For me, it has to be Jermaine Jenas. He has spent his entire career chasing the ball around like an eight-year-old on school sports day. How he ever managed to get near an England squad is beyond me. Darren.

MS: I’ll explain. Capello was present when Jenas had an absolutely outstanding game for Tottenham Hotspur against Arsenal in the Carling Cup. Given his recent arrival in English football, he thought this was his typical standard. As for Sven Goran Eriksson, he played Jenas in Azerbaijan when David Beckham was missing, and he did very well. At international level, with opportunities so limited, one good game is often enough to buy a player two years of selections, as happened with Jenas.

You have no idea about Raul, man. You just have to watch Real Madrid’s matches from 1994 to 1996, the Intercontinental Cup Final of 1998 and most of Spain's matches in the 2002 World Cup. Just research before writing in a journal such as The Times. The Armada.

MS: And talking of research, if The Armada had done his, he would know that, in England, his chosen web alias does not conjure images of a mighty fleet but of a bunch of Spanish sailors getting sunk in the Channel by a bloke who was on his lunch break. This, too, is not the whole story, just as I am sure my one sentence aside about Raul was not the definitive analysis on his talent. His figures are good, I know that, and I have seen him have very fine games. I would say, though, that when Real Madrid were firing, so was he, and when they faded, so did he. For all the hero worship he never made a good team great. He is no Diego Maradona.

I watch Zlatan Ibrahimovic play every week. If he is overrated then everybody is. He has been outstanding since joining Inter Milan, scoring more regularly than he ever did with Juventus and Ajax. He allows team-mates to score with great passes and displays tricks on the pitch with fantastic skills in minimal space. He has the bad luck to play for a team that dominates in Italy, but has huge difficulties against strong European teams. Also, his national team, Sweden, does not suit his capability. Of course, he still has some limits, but he is absolutely the best player of the past two years. Ale.

MS: Fair enough. The premise of my piece was that Ibrahimovic cannot be playing as he did against Liverpool every week, that there must be more to him. It was about admitting blind spots, rather than presenting conclusive proof.

John Terry is superb when the ball is crossed into the box, so when he plays against average premiership teams he looks great. However, as soon as you put him up against a decent team with creativity in attack, he looks out of his depth. He has never done it for England, never done it in the Champions League and needs a fast centre-half alongside him to make up for his deficiencies. He's not half as important to Chelsea as he thinks he is (Petr Cech and Ricardo Carvalho are the genuine world class players in the defence), yet fans and pundits alike deify him for his bulldog spirit. In England alone, Rio Ferdinand, Jonathan Woodgate and even Ledley King are far more accomplished and polished defenders and he is nowhere near the likes of Alessandro Nesta, Paolo Maldini and Carles Puyol. As for his leadership skills, if harassing the referee just because you have the captain's armband is leadership, then JT’s the man. Paul H.

MS: Sorry, Paul, but he would be my England captain. And if Chelsea have any hope of winning the title, John Terry must stay fit for the rest of the season. That says it all.

I submit Roberto Carlos as the most overrated free-kick taker. Scored a great one against France and ever since has been shooting them high up in the stands or against the wall. Tapfuma.

MS: Most great free-kick takers are a myth. Even David Beckham against Greece in 2001 needed seven attempts before he scored.

Martin, could you please let us know how many games you have watched of Ibrahimovic or Raul? Angel.

MS: Enough to be due a really great one.

Claude Makélélé: overrated and kept in the team merely because of reputation. Martino.

MS: Really? I think Chelsea are going to have a devil of a job replacing him. When they won the League under Jose Mourinho, he would have been my Footballer of the Year.

Unless you live a sorry life spending your weekends watching a constant feed of Football First, Spanish football and football Italia, then I’m afraid that it's all just guess work and hearsay, so please stop posting comments under the pretence that you should be Europe's top scout. Rob1234.

MS: I think you’ll find that everyone here is having a bit of harmless fun, Rob. The only person taking it at all seriously is you.

Roy Keane: one of the most average players of recent times, an upgraded Robbie Savage. No doubt he was a strong captain and an influence and inspiration to the more talented players around him but what football skills did he possess? Andrew Bell.

MS: You may wish to review the 1999 European Cup semi-final in which Keane knocks Juventus out, despite knowing he is banned for the Final; or the Republic of Ireland international in which he keeps the Holland team of Louis Van Gaal at bay. More talented team-mates? When Keane was on form he barely needed the other ten.

Deco: at a club with quality players such as Lionel Messi, Samuel Eto'o and Ronaldinho, it makes him look good when the team win comprehensively against lower opposition. He doesn't have the creativity others possess, lacks fitness and is now only pushing for a place warming the bench at Barcelona. Neil Thomas.

MS: On the night Barcelona travelled to play Chelsea at Stamford Bridge for the second year in succession, I had the privilege of a seat five rows from the pitch, very near the halfway line. The midfield was a minefield that day, so tight, so fast, the ball had to be collected, controlled and moved on in the blink of an eye. Only two players in that central area were up to it: Deco and Makelele. I have rarely been so impressed with a player. Over-rated? No, I’m not having it. And now, by popular demand, the debate that has gone absolutely nowhere for two years and yet still won’t go away. Yes, folks, you guessed it, in the blue corner, Frankie, in the red corner, Stevie, and I’m just going to leave the lot of you to it. 

Steven Gerrard is the biggest flat track bully. Looks great against West Ham, and when AC Milan had the day off, but has never produced on any stage for England. Michael Holloway.

Every critic here saying Gerrard is overrated will be saying Cristiano Ronaldo is next. How many times have we seen Gerrard drag Liverpool foward? Frank Lampard is a good player, but nowhere near the class of Gerrard. Time for a reality check: Lampard's past his sell-by date. Pedro.

Gerrard: massively overrated. He simply does not have the consistency of a player like Lampard, who is now underrated. James.

I am happy that in the past few seasons, people have started to pick up on Lampard’s faults, especially England fans. He scores goals but what else? He contributes very little to the passing side of the game and blasts it at every chance. And where does he go in big games? The reason Liverpool won the Champions League was that Gerrard is a big game player. Liam Hanfrey.

Gerrard is the most overrated player. He is good but not world class. Lampard is far better and scores more goals. Gerry. 

Lampard couldn’t buy a goal in the World Cup despite having the most shots. He was woeful. Turns like a tank, average technical skills but scoring four against a basket case club like Derby County leads to plaudits. At Juventus he would be lucky to get a game. Jonas, Liverpool.

Wake up, England. Your obsession with Viking footballers like Gerrard is why you'll go even longer without winning anything. For a true reflection of a player ask someone who sees him day in day out: his coach. Rafael Benitez realised very quickly that Gerrard had to be part of his set up but didn’t want him anywhere near the brains of his team because of his poor short passing game, severe tactical indiscipline and inability to dictate tempo. That is why he entrusts the running of Liverpool to proper central midfielders like Alonso and Lucas Leiva who don’t charge around a pitch. The last time Arsenal and Liverpool met, Cesc Fabregas made 109 successful passes, Gerrard made 33, yet Sky pundits judged Gerrard man of the match. Lampard is the best goal scoring midfielder in the world. Only one midfielder, in the professional game has managed to score more than 20 goals a season for four seasons in row, and this year he will make it five. Denton.

Lampard should not ever be considered ahead of Gerrard in the England set up. As for his Chelsea form, he scores goals mostly against weak opposition and is surrounded by a good team, which obscures his weaknesses. Bobby Singh.

Who would have guessed this blog would have degenerated into a Lampard versus Gerrard bitch-fest? Kevin Hennessy.

MS: Me, mate. That’s why I went to the pub after the letter about Deco. Cheers.

Comments

[Don diego]

THE most overrated footballer? John Terry. Period.

[Am]

Could i put emre's name into the debate. Played for inter, so bloody what. Has too many bad games

[Alex]

yes Giggs has played in the most physical and competitive league in the world however he is not cut out for United anymore. Why? Giggs cant beat players anymore, he gives the ball aay all the time, he cant cross, he wastes chances, he has the odd brilliant game where a glimmer of his past comes back to haunt the opposition but apart from that he is plain ol s**** mate..Also Paul Scholes since he has come back does look incredibly out of his depth. Worst finisher is roooooney..althugh i admire his other attributes. United will win the league tonight

[Duj]

Ryan Giggs has been killing Man Utd attacks for the past 5 years. He hasn't a footballing brain in his head. I urge you and your readers to focus your attention on him the next time Man U are playing, and you will see a poor footballer.

[Bill Price]

Carrick. Almost £20m for a guy with no pace, no tackling ability and doesn't score enough. I reckon if the BBC pundits didn't have a vested interest in his future, he'd still be cuddling up to Prince-Boateng on Spurs' bench.

[Ivan]

Dave. Did you just mention Messi overrated. Trust me a full season where he is fit he would be the best footballer in the world bar none. He can be one dimensional i agree but he is the definition of effective. He has done things we havent seen for years. Goal against Getafe anyone? Hat trick against Real Madrid? I believe he was injured for two or three months of last year (correct me if i'm wrong) and still finished 3rd in voting. He stays out wide? that's his position...... and he carried Barcelona before his most recent injury with deco/ronaldinho/eto'o/henry either injured away or off form.

[Daniel]

I have to agree with Paul H, John Trerry to me is as wonderful of a defender as Sendoros. He plays alongside the Premierships best midfielders and strikers which attack through out the whole game and the moment he clears the ball out or tackles Marlon Harewood he becomes a world class player and qualifies to be Englands captain. Absolute 'bonkas'. MS why step down you knew you were going to recieve such dumb comments.

[El Cid]

I can't believe no one has said Trezeguet!!
(I also agree with the Beckham and Terry nominations)

[Patrick]

Didn't see Beckham mentioned. His failure to deliver twice on penalties in two crucial penalty shootouts cost England a place in the 2004 European Championship final and the World Cup Final in 2006. His goal scoring tally in 100 international appearances is 17. Hardly awe inspiring.

[Dani Major]

I´m from Portugal, and I know that no one has yet talk about the National Teams.
But for example, C. Ronaldo,(I admit I dont really like him, and it annoys me because people think he´s a God, and I think he has some important defects). Anyway, despise everything, he does a wonderful job in the Premier League and all, but then when he plays at the Portugal team, he does nothing.

[William Jenkins]

Frank Lampard. OK, he has scored a lot of goals but he has scored his goals in a very strong team. He has not pace or skill to beat a player and not a creative thinker to pull out a fantastic pass. What he does have is amazing stamina to run and run all game, ensuring he is in the box when the ball comes in. May as well pay a top class athlete.
He can kick a dead ball into the box at set plays but that's it. I wish my parents were in charge of a premier league club when I was growing up!!!!

[Kevin Prince Boateng]

Cristiano Ronaldo is ridiculously over-rated. He is the ultimate flat track bully who will tear apart the likes of West Ham or Newcastle but goes AWOL against decent opposition. People forget too quickly his lacklustre display against Milan in the Champions League last year (after he had ridiculed a shabby Roma side a few weeks before) or the fact that Jamie O'Hara (an average midfielder playing out of position at left back) kept him very quiet when United played Spurs in the FA Cup. Most telling of all have been his displays against England in the past when Ashley Cole has had him firmly in his back pocket each and every time. The point being that any decent left back who isn't dazzled by the big reputation and quick feet but actually watches the ball has no trouble with him. Now I am not saying Ronaldo is not a good player and especially for Portugal he does play some great games but he does not even deserve to be mentioned in the same breath as the likes of Kaka or Messi who are world class. For me Ronaldo's scoring rate is superb and for a winger he is an exceptional header of the ball and of course he is quick but to go back a few years your Nedveds, Figos and Hagis were technically worlds apart from this flash harry. And as for that free kick dont even get me started... best Premiership goal ever??? Do me a favour! I think messrs Bergkamp, Di Canio, Yeboah or Le Tissier might beg to differ to name a few. I could also destroy Frank Lampard's reputation (to hazard a guess 500 shots, 20 goals, 18 of them deflections on average each season) or savage John Terry (slow, clumsy and dopey Woodgate and King must cringe everytime they watch him!) but I think I wasted enough time already. Thank you and goodnight.

[Strap]

The most over-rated "footballer" (sic) ever to have worn the Royal's hoops must be Jonny ImpOSTER. Never made it at any of his previous clubs, he's now maquerading as Premiership player at Reading. It's hard enough playing in this league as it is, without starting each game with 10 men and a passenger.

[hugo]

there are a lots of them!!!!
But Frank Lampard..........Let's talk about him.
He's rubbish. Good at right back but not in the center of the field. He loose so much balls.
But like I said, footballers especially in England (Spain is the gretest league) are rubbish!!!!!!!

[Francisco Appiani]

The king of overrated players:
David Becham!!!
Now he is demostrating his skills in competitive American League. I think he will end playing for the Hollywood´s stars Soccer team
Just a good kicker only at Manchester. It is not easy to demonstrate your skills when you have to play outside your country.

[Tom Poynton]

It has to be Eric Cantona. He flourished in the English league only because our defenders have absolutely no idea how to man-mark other players (we still don't, see C. Ronaldo), therefore he got away with his flicks and tricks (not to mention he had a nasty, spiteful side to his game, and was an complete savage when it came to tackling, especially when things weren't going his way). As soon as he played in Europe, and on the international stage with France, he was always nullified with ease, and made to look the average player he really was.

[Steve McConnell]

OWEN! All he had when young was speed. Now...nothing!

[Trahearne]

Frank Lampard the most overrated player in the premiership. tim cahill is far better, and lampard thinks hes the best. In england games hes rubbish, and he only "shines" for chelsea against far inferior opposition. whoever said Paul Scholes and Ryan Giggs were overrated need to sort it out. Scholes is the best Englsih player in the world. though i agree with the comment about Wayne Rooney, he's not a saviour!

[Roberto Cantarero]

I am a half-English half-Italian Mnachester United fans who has now been following both Premier League and Serie A for 10 years. As much as the Premier League is exciting and full of great players (4 clubs in the Champions League testify to that) we still must not forget that the strongest clubs often play against teams which are technically rubbish and have defences which are laughable. Ok you might get the odd surprising result (like Wigan or Birmingham or Middlesbrough stopping Arsenal or Liverpool) but is it really such a massive achievement scoring against the defences of teams like Derby County, Sunderland, Bolton, Fulham, Birmingham City, Middlesbrough and Wigan? Cagliari and Empoli are in the lower positions of Serie A but I would bet vast amounts of money on them beating Derby or Birmingham or Sunderland hands down if they ever had to play each other.

[Marco]

Firstly Raul. I'm not saying he was never good but he hasn't been for the last 4 years. Most footballers on average have a 10 year stint at the top. He had his by the time he was 26... now he's 29 and long gone. Have you ever heard of a press conference being held just because the FA equivalent wants a certain player to feature in the international side and the manager doesn't? LUDICROUS! Secondly Harry bloody kewel. I wouldn't pay him out in washers.

[Mark]

Stuart Downing (though thankfully now McClaren has gone we shouldn't be seeing him in an England shirt again), Michael Carrick (exactly what does he do?) and Kanu (gangling buffoon). On the Ibrahimovich subject, Martin O'Neill reckon he's the most overrated player in world football, and he ain't a bad judge.

[Yele]

Makelele overrated? Joker!!!Look at what happened and is still happening to Real Madrid when he left? They didnt win any silverware for 3 or 4 seasons.I wouldnt count the Championship they won because Barcelona handed that one to them.

The position he plays should be known as ''Makelele'' all over Europe

[rita]

Overated, over paid and over worshipped- all of them!

[tari]

David Beckham. If Peter Beardsley,who was one of the greatest ever English players had only the talent of Beckham would he have got into many teams?

[Leonard Colquhoun]

Why limit it to ten most overrated soccer players ? The whole game is overrated, full of bad acting and lacking the physicality of rugby. For quite different reasons, give me American Football and Australian Football any day; even Gaelic football, though lacking in serious body contact, has rules which allow skilful players to use the whole body and the four limbs we evolved with. Soccer seems to be the British Empire’s last, parting sick joke on an ungrateful world. BTW, I wonder how many old men in Africa are quietly murmuring, out of earshot of the local thugs who masquerade as their national governments, “I wish the British were back” ?