Football smugshots

Your footballing smugshots just keep flooding in, and to be honest we can't get enough.

The world's greatest footballers may be off sunning themselves on far flung foreign beaches but we want you to hunt them down and keep on sending us some of the best examples of arms-around-the-shoulders camaraderie that money just can't buy.

We admit that the idea was inspired by our Travel section and its forum for smug holiday pics, but we thought we could do better and, boy, you have proved us right.

In fact, your overwhelming response has forced us to open up a new gallery for you to fill all over again. But fear not, all your old favourites are safely tucked away in our archive if you want to revisit them. This time we really want you to outdo each other - a photographic Top Trumps if you will.

So if you and Michael Ballack have shared a heated exchange over that final sweaty Spanish sunbed, or if you and Steven Gerrard have spent a lazy summer night on the Algarve putting the world to rights, then we want to see the evidence.

For some inspiration we thought you'd like the picture above of Steve Coppell on holiday in Thailand, it looks as though Frank Kuch and friend perform a citizen's arrest on the Reading boss.
More of the same please.

E-mail your pictures to: sport@timesonline.co.uk

Click "continue reading" to see your pictures, including when Laurence Weir met Ricky Villa and Ossie Ardiles. Shame it wasn't in the "Coop for Tottingham" ...

Click on images to see them in their full, glorious size.

Sir Bobby gets a bit confused. Here he is putting his arm around his car and wondering who that bloke on his right is ruining the photo. It's Nick Gray, Bobby, and he's the one that requested the picture in the first place.

Is he having a laugh? George Mitchell meets Gordon Strachan at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, 2006.

Carolyn Perry says: "Here's a pic of me with Antonios Nikopolidis the night Greece won the European Championship in 2004. I was staying in the same hotel as the players and it was a great evening. My friend really fancied Nikopolidis so asked me to get a pic of him to take home - not sure the friend wanted me in the pic tho'. PS The packet of Marlboroughs is his, not mine." With friends like that...

Nick Webster and Roman Abramovich swap stories before Russia take on Spain in Innsbruck, Euro 2008.

Robin Jarvis, a life long West Ham supporter, finally got to meet Sir Geoff Hurst when the 1966 hat-trick hero visited Grand Cayman in July. Robin is delighted to have bought a replica West Ham shirt signed by World Cup winner in an auction. Sir Geoff seems distracted ... has Arthur Negus just entered the room?

Is this a case of a punter being hassled by a Premier League star? Don't be fooled. Jason Coates insists he was the most excited man in the world to meet Arsenal's Nicholas Bentdner at Glam nightclub in Puerto Banus. Maybe the occasion took a while to sink in.

Chris (blue and white England vest) and Dan (red England shirt) bumped into Des Lynam before the England v Portugal quarter-final final at Euro 2004 in Lisbon. They said he was as smooth as silk. Oh, and that's Andy Townsend (third from right, hiding behind the tall bloke).

Deano and Ben met David Trezeguet in a Barcelona nightclub last October. Deano describes the Juventus striker as a "top man". It looks to us as if the newly-retired French international has been zapped with a freeze-ray and taken advantage of, or has he been mesmerised by a podium dancer? It all boils down to the same thing.

Clarence Seedorf manages to see off the collected talent of Russ, Steve, Mark, Neil, Rob, Chris and Marc during "winner stays on" in Milan.

Daniel Stevens, who runs marathons in a Crystal Palace for the "banter" at last finds a friendly face in Mark Bright before the Great North Run in 2005

Frank Kuch and friend perform a citizen's arrest on Reading boss Steve Coppell during a golf holiday to Thailand.

A rather sodden Philip Glaister meets Holland and Nottingham Forest keeper Hans van Breuklen in Perth in 1984, back when "it used to rain in Australia."

Michael Sacks meets the legendary Hristo Stoichkov at the Nou Camp museum in Barcelona. Well we say meets, did the burly Bulgarian give you the time of day Michael?

Mitesh Parikh and his unlikely named cousin 'Tiger Roops' catch up with a slightly shady looking Uefa president Michel Platini.

Babatunde Fashola (left), the Governor of Lagos State, and Victor Olabode Munis attempt to rouse a sleepy Rio Ferdinand during the United defender's recent visit to Lagos.

Just look at how smug Rodney Marsh appears to be when meeting Tom Moody. And just look at how uncomfortable Tom looks as the former QPR star smothers him with his big hands.

Guilherme Larangeira runs into bona fide footballing legend Paulo Roberto Falcao, at Porto Alegre, airport in Brazil. Remembering that Falcao scored the second goal in the 3-2 World Cup final defeat to Italy in 1982, a game the Gremio-supporting Guilherme describes as the footballing version of Cinema Paradiso, he even forgives him for playing for arch enemies Internacional. "The man is a hero, no matter club rivalries," he says.

Savo Milosevic, looking like a cut-price version of Ian McCulloch, fails to charm Paul Coulting and (half of) Steve Girdlestone in Seville. "Couldn't score and couldn't even smile!" says Steve. Same old Savo then.

Mark Price and his Mum, Margaret greet Harry Redknapp at Southampton Airport after Portsmouth's victory over Wigan in April 2006 secured Premiership survival. No wonder 'Arry looks flushed.

Mum and Mark's wife Kathy Price also collared a rather distracted looking Matty Taylor who had scored the winning goal that day with a coolly taken penalty. Perhaps he was thinking about a move to Bolton.

Bill Thomas, left, and Robert Halton make a Gary McAllister sandwich before Liverpool's Champions League defeat to AC Milan in Brettos which is the oldest, and most probably the brightest, bar in Athens.

Martyn Pointer meets a surprisingly jovial Fergie before Manchester United's Champions League game with Sporting Lisbon in September 2007. Wonder if the canny Scot knew something we didn't?

Carlos Queiroz looks pretty pleased with himself too. Did he know that Portugal would come calling?

 

Gooner Kelly How and her sister were fortunate enough to sample the Gallic charm of Robert Pires at a Sarancens rugby match. The slightly odd-looking man skulking around at the back there is Pascal Cygan, who had to go well camouflaged for fear of reprisals from angry Arsenal fans.

Mitesh Parikh presents a picture of his cousin (known only as 'Tiger Roops' he says, which makes you wonder what his real name is) with Thierry Henry at what looks like a house party in someone's flat.

 
Hooray, our first summer holiday smugshot, courtesy of Pete Burrows, who says, "One's a legend at Stamford Bridge, loved by all the players and fans alike. And the other one is Scott Sinclair."

We're more than happy to see our readers having a bash at a rib-tickling caption, but in Pete's case he should really have left it to the experts.

A young Matty Jelfs, sporting a mightily impressive Carlos Valderrama style frizz, gives the then England captain some hairdressing tips in 2006.

He stoops to conquer. Gabi Gothold huddles up with Tottenham's Michael Dawson and Robbie Keane following Spurs' Uefa Cup win over Hapoel Tel Aviv.

Steve Meehan, left, and crew come equal first in a grinning competition with Chris Kamara in a bar in Sapporo following England's defeat of Argentina in World Cup 2002. Ah, those were the days....

Sir Bobby Charlton looks thrilled to meet Chelsea fan Lee Williams in Red Square. Still 13 hours later at the Luzhniki Stadium their expressions were reversed.

Sometimes a picture tells a thousand words and this is pure smug shots genius. Matt McTamaney shares with us the moment that Pele, perhaps not unreasonably as he wasn't a baseball player, refused to sign his baseball bat. We can only hope that you've recovered Matt!

Spurs fan David Wong meets up with Ray Clemence at the Sheraton in Phuket where he used to work. So why is it Ray looks like the waiter?

Why does Eric Cantona look so surprised? Is it because he's just realised that he has taken a wrong turn and found himself at Manchester Cricket Club? Or is it because Jimmy Flynn is wearing a blue cardy with a green t-shirt?

Who's got more teeth, Terry Venables or Damian Harvey from Pinner, Middlesex?

Laurence Weir doesn't mind crossing the North London divide. He's sent in a selection of players he has stalked, er, met over the years starting with Dennis Bergkamp.

Arsene Wenger manages to ignore the glare coming off Laurence's bonce.

John Barnes shows he has lost none of his style on the pitch and finally ...

The best one out the lot - Ricky Villa and Ossie Ardiles talk overcoats with Laurence.

Wayne Rooney can afford to wear a shocking shirt, Gerard Conway, can you?

Joe Cole doesn't seem to mind getting his meal interrupted by Jeremy Mordrick, who sent in a most brazen plug for his restaurant in Woodford Green, Essex. The cheeky so-and-so even included a link to the website. Ok, I'll mention it once and once only (and since I live down the road, Jeremy, I expect a freebie next time I'm passing). The eaterie is called "Rosso" and they have very small tea-cups.

Francseco Totti had just won the World Cup when his real dream came true - he got to pose with Nick McMellon in Sardinia. Some blokes have all the luck.

David Graniewitz from Jersualem, Israel, is in the doghouse - big style. Not with his youngest son, Na’or, who looks like the cat that has got the cream alongside Gus Poyet, but with his eldest son who only has half a baseball cap and a bit of an eye to show his mates at school. And to add insult to injury, Dad didn't even mention his name. David, do us a favour - give the boys the camera next time.

Say what you like about Roman Abramovich but he loves to be a man of the people. Here he towers over Richard, Andrew, Jack and Rebecca Reeves.

Kevin Campbell gets the treatment from Christopher Anderson and his pals in a bar called Perdu in Newcastle. Bless little Christopher, he signed off with: "Aged 22 Newcastle". Maybe he thinks he's Adrian Mole.

 

Mark Randall holds Jamie Carragher upright after Liverpool's Champions League semi-final win over Chelsea in 2007. We do hope you didn't take the shirt off his back, Mark. And then get Jamie to sign it.

Frank Lampard can't win. Here he is with Ash Burman at the Chelsea team hotel in Moscow. Ash is a self-confessed Manchester United fan but the England star still had the good grace to pose for a photo. And this is what Ash had to say: "I bumped into fat Frank Lampard and I tried to get him to hold my United scarf but he was having none of it. You can see the look of disgust on my face!" Give the fella a break, Ash. Firstly, I'm not too sure he'd be happy with the "fat" tag. Secondly, he has to live forever with that perma-tan.

Rossy G and Paul McGrath get well and truly striped up.

Matteo Yoon writes: "This is me with Kolo Toure in Brent Cross shopping centre. I met him and his wife in the children's department of H&M. Please note my face of genuine delight compared with his blank stare." You don't reckon it had anything to do with your tie then, Matteo?

In the days before Nicky Barmby was a Premier League player. Which were the days after Nicky Barmby was a Premier League player, if you get my drift. Here, the Hull City and former England star (incredible isn't it?) snuggles up in a Chelmsford bar with Ryan Halls, Rich Yeates and Nick Parsons.

Goran Arbutina (right) and his friend Bota attempt to escape from the vice-like grip of Germany defender Carsten Ramelow at the First European street football festival in Foca. I wonder if Stan Boardman has ever been there?

Bobby Charlton is a true gent isn't he? I mean, he's wandering around Red Square before the Champions League final, minding his own business when he's set upon by a Millwall fan (Daniel Flaherty) with an small umbrella growing out of the side of his head! Does he run for it, not a chance, nothing frightens our Bob, and he's even good enough to pose for a picture...they don't make 'em like that anymore.

PJ reckons this picture was taken after a bad day at the races in Galway. Either Ian Rush found the only sun ray in Ireland that day, or he's been slapping on the St Tropez like there's no tomorrow.

Paul Clarke from Wanstead (a lovely place, I can vouch for that) gazes at Arsenal legend Liam Brady. Paul's missus noted when he showed her the pic: "You are looking at Liam more lovingly than you ever look at me in our photos." She doesn't understand does she, Paul?

James, Daniel and Adrian Gough of Kowloon Cricket Club, Hong Kong, enjoying the company of Wimbledon's FA Cup-winning star Lawrie Sanchez and Left Foot Forward author and Charlton old boy Garry Nelson. Looks like Lawrie should have gone for the "large" rack when he chose his t-shirt.

David Attenborough usually travels to the Antarctic to get this close to a huddle of penguins. Des McDonagh and his dad just went to the Glasgow Hilton. Des is on the left, then there's his dad with the specs, followed by Murdo McLeod and Wim Jansen, the Celtic legends that stopped Rangers winning the league title for a tenth consecutive year in 1998.

We're assuming that this picture taken in Moscow with Wael from Amman, Jordan, was snapped before the Champions League final. Nobody, not even Frank Lampard, could be that cheerful after what happened in the Luzhniki Stadium.

Wael doesn't hang about with C-listers, does he? Now it's Fabio getting the full smug treatment.

Emily Crocker (formerly Gemelas) travelled all the way from Vancouver in Canada to meet up with her Greek hero, Stelios, at Bolton and then a bloke with no chin goes and spoils it all.

Is that Ouch or Crouch with little Aiden?

"Look at the camera", says Steven Gerrard. "Look at that ice cream van" says Aiden. Some things are more important, Stevie.

Paul Messer reckons he's made KK's day judging by the grin on his face. Little does he know that Keegan has just checked his diary and found that he's got a hairdresser's appointment in half an hour. Sadly, his perms took so long to set back in 1983 that he missed four games while he was under the dryer.

It's 1977 and tight trackies were all the rage. So was Kenny Dalglish and he made Stephen Shaw one very happy bunny. Although, Stephen does point out that he's not actually Scottish. So great choice of shirt then - I bet you were a hit with your mates in the playground.

What a gent - moments after Chelsea's disappointing draw with Bolton on the final day of the season, when they lost the Premier League title, Avram Grant still had time to pose with Alex Morison. Is that his minder on the left, though? Dennis Waterman was far more intimidating.

One of the most decorated players in Manchester United's history, so why has Denis Irwin gone with this seventies brown get-up, wonders Finnbar Cornwall.

Manchester City fan Jaron Birkan (left) is humbled by the presence of United legend Sir Bobby Charlton after bunking into the Royal Box during the 1993 FA Cup final.

Sometimes we just can't top the captions you send in with your photos. I'll let Brendan Collins take over on this one: "It was the night before the biggest match in Fulham's history...and Roy Hodgson needed a drink. The rest is history. Smugly yours, Brendan." Priceless...

Niall Orr from Berkshire wonders why Rivaldo is wandering around with a spare arm attached to his jacket. Rivaldo wonders how long Pritt Stick takes to dry out so that he can peel his phone off the side of his head.

"Alright Kenny," says Phil Wall, "you might be one of the best Scottish strikers of all time, but can you perfect the Teen Wolf look like I have?"

Sometimes smug shots just has to put humour to one side and let your words do the talking. Thanks to Mark Mcmanus for sending this one in. He said: "With yesterday's distressing news of the death of Celtic legend Tommy Burns, I thought I'd share this with you. A few months ago I was looking through the attic when I discovered a picture of myself with Tommy, circa 1976 or thereabouts. I posted it to Celtic Park and asked the great man if he would sign it. He did, and returned the signed picture immediately. He was always a gentleman, a true Celt, and one the nicest blokes in the game. Rest in Peace, Tommy, you will be missed."

A very, very 'relaxed' looking Stevie G enjoys a night out at the Hard Days Night hotel on Merseyside. And to his right we have Roderick Hassani who claims to have enjoyed 'a few drinks' with the Liverpool star. You sure you didn't sneak up ask if you could have your picture taken with him Roderick?

Megan and Gabriel Hondius, right, meet David Beckham. Gabriel looks slightly worried by something, perhaps someone should have warned him that since Becks was dropped he gets a little touchy if he sees anyone wearing 'his' England No 7 shirt. That goes for you too Bentley...

Mark Schwarzer towers over the appropriately named Kevin Short. The pair share a rather tender embrace in the players' lounge after the 8-1 victory over Manchester City.

Here is the first in a special smug shot trio...the first of which catches Alexander Hleb midway through his rendition of the latest Belarussian gangster rap anthem. Ranford Henry, to his right, appears slightly bemused by it all.

Ranford continues to stalk his way round Arsenal's London Colney Heath training ground unnoticed... this time Armand Traore is the unsuspecting player.

Only kidding. Ranford and his cousin Nathan, here with Emmauel Eboue, were enjoying a trip round the Arsenal training ground after winning a competition. Ranford said: "What a day too… We met every single player…. Shook hands with God himself ‘Arsene Wenger’… set Theo up for a tap in goal… not really!!!We've probably not smiled as much in our entire lifes… and Flamini promised with a wink he would be staying… dodgy geezer!!!"

And you thought Danny Dichio has been consigned the footballing scraphead, not a chance. Here he is with Yunus Mollayev at Toronto FC's new, 20,000- seater BMO field, his new home.

Harby Abrar Singh tries to suppress a smirk as Djibril Cisse gives it his best mean and moody. Sadly for Djibril, nobody is going to take him seriously in that shirt.

Adam Yusuf and Everton's Steven Pienaar do a passable impression of the Men in Black while in Andalucia, southern Spain.

David Nelson collars Golden Balls himself. And although some might say that Becks resembles a life-size cardboard cut-out more often that not, he looks especially 2-D in this particular smug shot.

This is why we love smug shots. Here we have Patrick Hughes, left, and his friend Waheed Akbar (white t-shirt) lining up alongside the Pakistan national football team in Katmandu airport. Clearly the team were warming-up for their latest international with a quick round of golf!

David James never did like Millwall but stabbing a lion in the back of the head with a felt tip is a bit much. Here he meets Sean Jones in Blantrye, Malawi where the Portsmouth keeper has a foundation to help poor children.

Jubril Alao catches William Gallas moments before the Arsenal captain throws off his shirt, sits in the middle of the road, sticks his bottom lip out and whinges: "it's my road and nobody else is allowed to walk in it."

Pete Hardaker is as happy as a sandboy (are you sure?) to meet Chris Kamara whilst supervising a sixth form trip to see Fulham v Birmingham. Very rewarding. What happened to taking your pupils to a Shakespeare play at the Globe Theatre or mucking out the strays at Battersea Dogs Home? This country.

McFadden and Hardaker (Pete's no one-hit wonder). Here he meets a soon-to-be Championship striker (his words, not ours).

Whatever happened to Frank "I won ze Wurld Coop" Leboeuf? Here's the answer: the former Chelsea star has been living it up in Santa Monica, California with Raciel Diaz. Raciel says: "An entry for your silly (but-fun-to-read) blog on "Football Smug Shots". Me shamelessly posing with Chelsea old boy, Frank Leboeuf." Hang on just a goddam minute there Raciel. Silly? SILLY? You don't see us walking around with an extra pair of eyes and a nose growing out of our head do you?

Wes Brown goes all stylish in Manchester's Tiger Tiger despite Amit Verma and Krishan Ramdoo doing their best to put him off with the biggest grins on the planet.

David Wong gets a close-up of Edwin van der Sar's Adam's apple while strolling around town in Manchester. Ed, you play for the richest club in the world, your talents between the sticks are unquestionable ... and you tuck your shirt into your trousers. That's bad.

Here we have Bob Logie somehow managing to squeeze into a photograph with King Kenny Dalglish after a curry in Glasgow. Looks like the Liverpool legend may have had one keema nan too many. Anyway, more impressive is the little tale Bob tells: "My mum once gave Graeme Souness the belt when she was a teacher in Edinburgh. Unfortunately I don’t have a photo of that, and thought better than to mention it to Kenny." Mrs L is one brave lady.

What's the difference between Gary Lineker and Underground Ernie? One always has a smug grin on his face, looks plastic in front of the camera, has huge ears and a silly hat. And the other one is Underground Ernie. Oh and in the middle is Andy Weir (who just happens to be a mate of the Peter Kay looky-likey that's draped all over David Hirst lower down the page. This feature gets more surreal every day.)

Ben Sahar, the Chelsea striker, takes time out from creosoting the fence to meet Gerald Buxton.

Sometimes we just can't better the captions you send in accompanying your photos. I'll let Tom Kirby from Sheffield take over on this one: "Even if I say so myself, here's the king of all footballing smug shots. Featuring Wednesday legend David Hirst meeting the legendary me." Priceless.

After a pleasant, albeit short, holiday in Lilliput, Gulliver, aka Nick Crossley, bumps into one of the giants of Brobdingnag. Ok, Jonathan Swift didn't make this up - it's Crouchy wandering through Manchester city centre the day before a friendly with Jamaica. If ever he gives up football, the Liverpool striker could get a job as an undercover detective.

Two things:

1) Couldn't Ter McGowan lay his hands on a bigger tie, or was he just doing his Oliver Hardy impression?
2) I wonder if Bobo Balde returned that arm he borrowed after the photograph was taken.

Here's another example of Jose's style. Not that he was dining at Scallines in Kensington. More the fact that he was happy to pose with Steven Rutherford without mentioning that he has a woman's head growing out of his shoulder.

It's lucky Scott Wilson and Frankie Steinberg have a large wingspan otherwise they'd never have been able to strike this pose with Chris Waddle after a charity match.

Dave Glover couldn't get a full turn out of Ronaldinho so he settled for 180°.

Roy Beeharry gets in amongst the Tottenham team including Mark Yeates, Jermain Defoe and Robbie Keane during their tour of Malaysia in 2005. Roy was called up to the Spurs bench by Martin Jol, probably because he bore far more of a resemblance to a professional footballer than Andy Reid (on the right) who was obviously in need of a bit more pre-season training.

Nick Taylor had the honour of hosting Spurs holy trinity of Steve Perryman, Osvaldo Ardiles and Ricky Villa at his 45th birthday party at an Italian restaurant in Bournemouth. And this despite the Argentinian duo's normally impeccable radar taking them the wrong way down the M27 to Portsmouth.

Matthew Murray meets the greatest of them all at a Pele 'Soccer Camp' in New York in 1982. And yes Pele does appear to be wearing a t-shirt with his own autograph on it. Draw your own conclusions.

If you still can't get enough then click here for more of your smug shots.

Comments

[Zara]

David Hayman is so fit.

[Jake]

Is that David Hayman from S-Club Juniors with Thierry Henry?

[Henrymen]

CAN'T YOU GET SOME BETTER PHOTOS - THERE'S AN ELEMENT OF DODGINSS ABOUT THE MAJORITY OF THESE

[Adeolu Alagbe]

You really must be joking of the picture you have of Ferdinand and Victor Olabode Munis because THAT friend with them is Babatunde Fashola { SAN} the EXECUTIVE Governor of Lagos state, Nigeria.
please correct it.....ouch

[Sonny B]

I saw Ray Clements in the Octagon bar at the Midland Manchester about ten years ago. Wish I'd had a camera cos when his mate handed him a pint it slipped through his fingers and smashed on the floor!

[Alex]

How sad and freakish do you actually have to be to go up to someone well known and ask to have your photo taken with them?

Do these people think that somehow having such a picture makes them special in some way?

Pathetic.

[Michal]

Wenger

Arsene Wenger manages to ignore the glare coming off Laurence's bonce.

That picture looks fake though

[Nazir Musa]

Try again.
I have a whole collection of pics with the famous alongside my son Mohammed. We have a couple of season tickets sat right next to the visiting managers at Ewood Park, Blackburn. If you care to loan us a half decent camera for next season we could take some right dcent pics for you guys and you'd be amazed at the manguage that goes on at the touchlines from them. Worst as yet - Steve McLaren. Best behaved Jean Tigana/Arsene Wenger

[nina]

cool